Very simple question, you're forced to have sex with an animal, something not of the human species. I just invented a Laser that can shrink you or make you larger, the animal can be of any size and shape. Insects are included and so are ocean creatures. Also the animal cannot harm you in anyway while the humpfest is going on, but it will give you 1 minute to escape after you are done, so this may elimanate dangerous animals for those not looking to get eaten. You also have the choice to give or recieve

Which animal would you bone and why?

For me its a toss up between a eel and a hippo. I would probably be the pitcher for the hippo, but depending on my mood, we'll see about the eel. If its an electric eel then maybe that can be like, some kinky thing or whatever.

Have you ever smelled a Hippo? You might want to rethink that., or bring a scented candle.

hippo? You like fat girls?

waitamintue....what kinda ****ed up thread isthis?

Hippos are some of the most dangerous creatures on Earth and you have a chance to **** the **** outta it

It would be a great conversation starter with a girl you've just met, thats if the hippo doesnt happen to catche up with you in a minute and ****ing eats you alive because you didnt give the fat ******* a reach around

I just have this to say about this thread:

a LION...theysret so sexynesss

Question: What about extinct animals?

What, like a dodo or somet?

Wow! Awsome thread!

I'm gonna go with a Great White shark. I'm scared to death of the ocean, so this would be a good way of overcoming my fears.
I would be the pitcher, and go to town on a female (Im straight as an arrow) White shark. Make it a midnight romp as well, because that would be even scarier.

More likely a dinosaur.

i was thinking a cat. theres a reason hot girls that are animals are always cats.

true story: like 8 years ago, i was chillin at like book group and the families have kids or whatever, so its me, my brother, josh, his bro ben, and adam. and we're chillin in ben's basement and hes fingering his cat. blatantly fingering it. hand job to the max. so we are like "uhhhh dude what are you doing? why are you fingering your cat?" and his answer: "because she enjoys it!"

i brought this up with him about 2 years ago and he wholeheartedly denies it, and hes mad at me for even bringing it up and spreading all these untrue rumors about it. but i called my brother, and he remembers too. so i aint crazy.

but yeah, i'd bone a cat.

I think this means you want to bone ben.




Is there an extinct animal that was all boobs? If so, that's what I choose.

Whale. I'd be speaking literally, but my friends would think I'm speaking metaphorically. And I would smirk. Everytime.

Apart from that, I'd just want to nail the most ferocious deadly animal I could find. It would make me pretty hardcore. And if the animals ever found out, they'd be my bitch.

I had a bunch of eel jokes such as I don't see the app-eel or I can't believe this thread is for-eel but it would be stupid to post them

I have problems with the word "forced"

"get to", might be better.

Yeah, this isn't like a "would you rather" situation, where you've got to make a Hobson's Choice (<--- sobriety brings words and phrases back I never even knew I forgot). Man, if I get lucky enough to be able to back-door a male Liger, or maybe actually put it in a WHALE VAGINA, then, Boy Howdy! Sign a brother up.

Wang

gotta say blue whale, just so i could have a six foot penis for a day

i need a break from lugging around the 7-foot model all day? no? ah, go to hell

I think I need to get back to General.

Rhinocerouses don't play games. They fucking charge your ass!

I think we need to rethink your admission.

She totally wants it right there...

Ding Ding we have a winner.

I once told my suitemates in college that if they stole a penguin from a zoo and gave it to me and I got to keep it as a pet that i would fvck it and let them watch.

what?.....call peta.

Okay, I get you a penguin, regardless where i get one

Will you still **** it for us?

As long as I get to keep it as a pet afterwards.

Hmm, see I'm kind of a lonely guy and thought I could start spending my Sundays taking the penguin to the park, buy it ice cream and such.

All right you get the penguin, but I get every other Sunday, oh, I also can come over and **** the **** out of that little ******* whenever the **** I want

"Why couldn't she have the fish part on top and the human part on the bottom?" - Philip J. Fry

Wow... you guys are sick.

I'd bone a polar bear.

They're the only known species of animal to consciously stalk human beings .... so I think a good *** raping would teach those big furry ****ers not to mess with us homo sapiens

plus they're cute