Once upon a time, on a farm in Texas, there was a little red hen who scratched about the barnyard until she uncovered quite a few grains of wheat.

She called all of her neighbors together and said, "If we plant is wheat, we shall have bread to eat. Who will help me plant it?"

"Not I," said the cow.

"Not I," said the duck.

"Not I," said the pig.

"Not I," said the goose.

"Then I will do it by myself," said the little red hen. And so she did.

The wheat grew very tall and ripened into golden grain.

"Who will help me reap my wheat?" asked the little red hen.

"Not I," said the duck.

"Out of my classification," said the pig.

"I'd lose my seniority," said the cow.

"I'd lose my unemployment compensation," said the goose.

"Then I will do it by myself," said the little red hen, and so she did.



At last it came time to bake the bread.

"Who will help me bake the bread! ?" asked the little red hen.

"That would be overtime for me," said the cow.

"I'd lose my welfare benefits," said the duck.

"I'm a dropout and never learned how," said the pig.

"If I'm to be the only helper, that's discrimination," said the goose.

"Then I will do it by myself," said the little red hen. She baked five loaves and held them up for all of her neighbors to see.


They wanted some and, in fact, demanded a share. But the little red hen said, "No, I shall eat all five loaves."

"Excess profits!" cried the cow.

"Capitalist leech!" screamed the duck.

"I demand equal rights!" yelled the goose.

The pig just grunted in disdain.

And they all painted "Unfair!" picket signs and marched around and around the little red hen, shouting obscenities.

Then a government agent came, he said to the little red hen, "You must not be so greedy."

"But I earned the bread," said the little red hen.

"Exactly," said the agent. "That is what makes our free enterprise system so wonderful. Anyone in the barnyard can earn as much as he wants. But under our modern government regulations, the productive workers must divide the fruits of their labor with those who are lazy and idle,"

And they all lived happily ever after, including the little red hen, who smiled and clucked, "I am grateful, for now I truly understand,"

But her neighbors became quite disappointed in her. She never again baked bread because she joined the "party" and got her bread free.

And all the Democrats smiled. 'Fairness' had been established.
Individual initiative had died, but nobody noticed; perhaps no one cared.....as long as there was free bread that "the rich" were paying for.

Bill Clinton is getting $12 million for his memoirs.

Hillary got $8 million for hers.

That's $20 million for memories from two people, who for eight years, repeatedly testified, under oath, that they couldn't remember anything.

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY, OR WHAT?

haha

its such a shame whats about to happen to you.


im a conservative-leaning independent, and i kinda enjoyed this...

but the internet hates anything conservative

bring it!!!

Sorry, so do you support liberals?

Hey, the joke/parable speaks the truth.

I'm glad ur not getting flamed right now by ppl who might not appreciate the hilarity of this.

Good post kid, flippin' hilarious.

(And somewhat true :wink: )

I am conservative minded and I liked it. (actually I've seen it before). :clap:

Ha. I love it. Great post.

Funny story, regardless of political beliefs....me likey

thats not at all what liberalism is about. that is what close-minded conservatives think liberalism is about.

it's true!

http://www.fuckthesouth.com

wow..

some extremist is gonna have to take offense to this.

i cant believe it didnt happen yet.



i think its great.... and im gonna send it to my liberal dad, as hes always sending me propaganda.

I liked it as well. Nice one.

Funniest joke I've heard in quite a while.....

Did you guys hear the one about the republican cronie who was given an important government appointment when his previous job was running an Arabain Horse association...

Newsflash, every president has done something similar.

perhaps you could give me some more newsflashes then to let me know what other president in contemporary history has employed cronyism as extensively as this one

Lol.

As A Canadian, its pretty funny that in the States, gay marriage, stem cell research (anti the research based on ridiculous religious beliefs), and Janet Jackson's boobs are more important than health care, the economy, a fake war, and the fact that the President of the United States is a complete moron.

Bill Clinton lies about a BJ and faced impeachment, George Bush lies about a war, and has shown, over, and over, and over, and over, and over that he's completely incompetent, and he won re-election.

Good thing the US spent billions and billions and billions to invade two third world countries, let wouldn't spend a few million at home to reinforce some levies that it was public record would break if a level 4 hurricane hit.

Makes you wonder.

How about we leave politics to the guys at NWP...

Maybe they didnt employ a guy who was in an Arabian Horse Association, but have still given positions to less than able people.

Regardless, the joke still speaks the truth. Libs are nothing more than a bunch of whining crybabies who never get anything done.

Or how about the one about the medal recipient whose faulty "slam dunk" intelligence led us into a war that costs $200 billion per year and (to date) over 1000 American lives? That's a pretty good one, too.

Because, it was bad intelligence after all, wasn't it? It wasn't deliberate. It couldn't have been.

Hey guys, I hear some people involved in politics may not be paragons of virtue! Please pass on this breaking news to everyone you see!

The vast majority of politicians on all sides of every argument care about little more than the well-being of themselves and their closest supporters. Let's not delude ourselves into believing it's only the party we like least that acts this way.

cronyism is a fact of all politics, but this administration has elevated it to religious status - loyalty and personal relationship are given priority over legitimate qualification. Did you know the previous director of FEMA was mike brown's college roommate?

That's just as retarded a statement as "Republicans are all either extremely rich or extremely stupid".

Both statements are partially true, but ridiculous nonetheless.

and this, my dear boy, is why i gave up and moved from the states to ontario.

i do wish someone told me hamilton was a shthole first, though.

they never get anything done - seriously can you ask every administration to be as successful as the current one in doing as much for the top 1%?

This makes complete sense! I mean, such complex ideas as politics and economics are analygous to barnyard animals!

Maybe the cow discovered how to properly breed the strains of wheat, the goat built the oven, and the pig developed the recipe to make bread. All this illustrates is the narrow points of view held by so many, in every spectrum of belief.

We make you guys move there first, then if you're good, we'll let you move. Don't tell anyone though, it's our secret.

Do the names Bill and Hillary ring a bell?

I wonder how long it takes to reinforce a levee, and secondly, is that really the federal governments job? Isn't there a local or state committee that deals with levees? I think so. Maybe if the governor had let W bring in the national guard we couldve avoided all of this. By "this" i mean the rampant looting and gang rule, during those few days immediately following the storm.

I dont want to get into that, but the joke was quite funny.

Thanks for name-dropping - how about some examples now of their cronyism? By the way, just ask if you want more examples from the Bush administration if you cannot come up with anything...

to windsor?

chill out. just a fan of generalizations. my experience with libs is that the above holds true.

You did know the funding was cut for this project, right?

BTW, I agree with you that a lot of blame falls with the local goverment, but I hope you can admit that the federal government dropped the ball on this well before the response

I bet you know a lot of them - or do you just hear about them on Rush?

Yeah but have you heard the above by any liberals in this thread?

As a Canadian, it's pretty sad that in Canada, corruption and embezzlement, lying and stealing, indecision and lack of leadership are tolerated and overlooked by many, despite the fact that the Prime Minister of Canada is a complete moron.

The Liberal party has fucked us over and over, and they win re-election.

Makes you wonder...eh.

Who can deny that liberals are perpetually finger pointing and placing blame rather than actually talking about solutions to problems or offering innovative ideas...its always someones fault, and if the dems were elected then all problems would magically go away and everyone farts would smell like strawberries.

I am not a republican nor a democrat, but it just seems like the dems are the worse when it comes to political posturing, trash talking, and finger pointing. The republicans actually do something...although what they do is often not in the best interest of all. The democrats talk a lot, but they really don't deliver much except failed government programs and rhetoric.

People fail to realize that the majority of our country's problems are rooted in the mass effects of individual consumer's behaviors...not the government.

Now dont go that far allie.

I'm not starting a war, those scandals might have been pretty brutal but granted they were helping canadian companies which in turn help our economy. And it wasnt all evil liberal until recent.

but sometimes the best leaders are the ones who do nothing, which is better than putting us in debt.



and for the OP.. hahahah hilarious., good stuff man. I hate the world

i hate conservatives, i hate this post

Windsor may be a pit, but I'm currently loving the city with the highest bar per capita ratio of any city in North America. You don't come to Windsy for the ambience, but the people are awesome.

To the OP:

It's funny to see what another Limbaugh/O'Reilly dupe finds amusing.

Seriously, Republicans will be blaming Clinton for everything until 2146. It goes both ways.

Also, Republicans currently control the White House, both houses of Congress and have a majority on the Supreme Court. If anything is wrong, it's their fault and the Democrats are correct for pointing it out. Most of what the Dems want to accomplish is either pushed off the agenda or voted down by the ruling party.

The tide will turn again. Like so many things, politics is cyclical. The Republicans will be out of power and pointing fingers again in no time.

Shut up and read something for once.

...

**** the South. **** 'em. We should have let them go when they wanted to leave. But no, we had to kill half a million people so they'd stay part of our special Union. Fighting for the right to keep slaves - yeah, those are states we want to keep.

And now what do we get? We're the ****ing Arrogant Northeast Liberal Elite? How about this for arrogant: the South is the Real America? The Authentic America. Really?

Cause we ****ing founded this country, assholes. Those Founding Fathers you keep going on and on about? All that bullshit about what you think they meant by the Second Amendment giving you the right to keep your assault weapons in the glove compartment because you didn't bother to read the first half of the ****ing sentence? Who do you think those wig-wearing lacy-shirt sporting revolutionaries were? They were ****ing blue-staters, dickhead. Boston? Philadelphia? New York? Hello? Think there might be a reason all the ****ing monuments are up here in our backyard?

No, No. Get the **** out. We're not letting you visit the Liberty Bell and ****ing Plymouth Rock anymore until you get over your real American selves and start respecting those other nine amendments. Who do you think those ****ing stripes on the flag are for? Nine are for ****ing blue states. And it would be 10 if those Vermonters had gotten their ****ing Subarus together and broken off from New York a little earlier. Get it? We started this shit, so don't get all uppity about how real you are you Johnny-come-lately "Oooooh I've been a state for almost a hundred years" dickheads. **** off.

Arrogant? You wanna talk about us Northeasterners being ****ing arrogant? What's more American than arrogance? Hmmm? Maybe horsies? I don't think so. Arrogance is the ****ing cornerstone of what it means to be American. And I wouldn't be so ****ing arrogant if I wasn't paying for your ****ing bridges, bitch.

All those Federal taxes you love to hate? It all comes from us and goes to you, so shut up and enjoy your ****ing Tennessee Valley Authority electricity and your fancy highways that we paid for. And the next time Florida gets hit by a hurricane you can come crying to us if you want to, but you're the ones who built on a ****ing swamp. "Let the Spanish keep it, it’s a shithole," we said, but you had to have your ****ing orange juice.

The next dickwad who says, "It’s your money, not the government's money" is gonna get their ass kicked. Nine of the ten states that get the most federal ****ing dollars and pay the least... can you guess? Go on, guess. That’s right, ************, they're red states. And eight of the ten states that receive the least and pay the most? It’s too easy, *******, they’re blue states. It’s not your money, assholes, it’s ****ing our money. What was that Real American Value you were spouting a minute ago? Self reliance? Try this for self reliance: buy your own ****ing stop signs, assholes.

Let’s talk about those values for a ****ing minute. You and your Southern values can bite my ass because the blue states got the values over you ****ing Real Americans every day of the goddamn week. Which state do you think has the lowest divorce rate you marriage-hyping dickwads? Well? Can you guess? It’s ****ing Massachusetts, the ****ing center of the gay marriage universe. Yes, that’s right, the state you love to tie around the neck of anyone to the left of Strom Thurmond has the lowest divorce rate in the ****ing nation. Think that’s just some aberration? How about this: 9 of the 10 lowest divorce rates are ****ing blue states, *******, and most are in the Northeast, where our values suck so bad. And where are the highest divorce rates? Care to ****ing guess? 10 of the top 10 are ****ing red-ass we're-so-****ing-moral states. And while Nevada is the worst, the Bible Belt is doing its ****ing part.

But two guys making out is going to ****ing ruin marriage for you? Yeah? Seems like you're ruining it pretty well on your own, you little bastards. Oh, but that's ok because you go to church, right? I mean you do, right? Cause we ****ing get to hear about it every goddamn year at election time. Yes, we're fascinated by how you get up every Sunday morning and sing, and then you're ****ing towers of moral superiority. Yeah, that's a workable formula. Maybe us ****ing Northerners don't talk about religion as much as you because we're not so busy sinning, hmmm? Ever think of that, you self-righteous assholes? No, you're too busy erecting giant stone tablets of the Ten Commandments in buildings paid for by the ****ing Northeast Liberal Elite. And who has the highest murder rates in the nation? It ain't us up here in the North, assholes.

Well this gravy train is ****ing over. Take your liberal-bashing, federal-tax-leaching, confederate-flag-waving, holier-than-thou, hypocritical bullshit and shove it up your ass.

And no, you can't have your ****ing convention in New York next time. **** off.

...

The problem isnt that conservatives are ignorant, its that they are happy about it.

And why are the democrats not in power...because they didnt win elections. ha. stupid sore losers.

To clarify things for our American friends, Democrats are NOT liberals. In the two party system of the USA, the choices right now are:

a) Christian Conservative

Less Devout Christian Conservative

Neither of the major U.S. political parties are even close to the left side of the political spectrum. The Conservative party in Canada would be considered incredibly liberal to Americans.

There may be Democrats who are liberals, and liberals who vote Democrat, but the Democratic party is definitely not liberal in its policies.