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#1 Balloon guy

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 10:56 AM

So I thought describing a typical session I play online. This should give you a glimpse into what I think is a solid foundation for a future online tensofthousandaire.1st you should know that when the poker boom first started I was skeptical and waited till there were fewer players playing online. The more players there are, the harder it is to be the best right? After the passage of the Gaming bill, I found much more manageable sized games, and the people that were there seem to be there everyday so I can really get a read on them and eventually make those huge laydowns that only top pros can make.Before I play I prepare myself by setting aside many different items that will insure my success:Paper and pencil to take notes of other players.WaterPretzelsCookies( to reward myself for good play )Calculator for pot oddsAbacus for when most of the other players are oriental ( this lets them know I am not intimidated )Computer (duh )Tissues ( sinuses )Trash can (for tissues )A few Poker Books such as Play Poker Like the Pros (duh ) Phil Gorden's Little Green Book, and the classic Professor, Banker and Suicide King. So rather than list my many philisophical ideas, basic understanding of the difference between limit and no limit ( you make and lose way more money in no limit ) and other things that give me the credits to perform at my best, I will describe last night's session, which is pretty typical of my play:I log onto my dial up, this can take up to 5 minutes so I take advantage of this time to go to the bathroom, turn on High Stakes Poker ( I have them all recorded ) and make any work calls I need to. I believe in trying to get the most out of every second of the day.I first go to Full Tilt Poker and rail some big games, I like to try to say witty things in the chat box to get the pros to notice me. This way, when I play with them later they will think: "That's the guy that always watched me play, I better be careful of him and respect his raises" Then I go to Full Contact Poker and sit down at a PLO8 $6/$12 game. I know no one else will play that level on the site, so I am safe from having to risk any money, but if any opponents are surfing around, they will see me sitting at this tougher game at a higher stake and think: "This guys a player; I should respect his raises" I of course look around at the bigger tables to do the same thing. It is important though to be 'away' while sitting at these tables since my bankroll is too small to have any serious money if front of me, and when you are away it just says 'away' with no money.Then I logged onto the $.25/$.50 no limit table for $20. This is a good table choice for me because I am way better than anyone that would play this level, so I can relax my focus if I need to and still post a winner on many nights. I used to really tear up the $.05/$.10 with like 3 or 4 BB every hour. The $20 will also protect me from any coolers like the nut flush draw vs overpair etc.First hand I post $.50 since the button is to my left. I mean come on, I didn't sit down to not play. Get dealt 96 off. First guy to act ( under the gun) raises to $2. Everyone folds so it's up to me to make sure this guy knows I am not afraid of him. I call for a discount ( Thank you Vince Van Patton ) and see the flop, hoping he has AK so I can put him on a hand. Flop comes J 9 3 two spades. Now the spades worry me because most flushes are made with spades, so I figure I better protect my hand. But I got position so I don't get the chance. This guy bets like $6. I mean come on, the pot only has like $5 in it and he bets over the pot. Looks like Mr. AK doesn't like the flop and wants me gone. Sorry bully man, there's a new Sheriff in town and his name is Balloon Guy. I raise to $12 and he calls so fast I almost type in the chat: 'AK huh?' Where do they come from? Well now I am feeling really good, but the turn in the K of hearts. Man how can I get so unlucky. He checks, but I'm not falling for that, I only bet $2 which is only 1/3 my stack so I can fold if he raises. He just smooth calls. So smooth. River is the 3 of hearts, so now I have two pair, which can beat a pair of kings, but one of the trademarks of a good player is to not bet when they can't stand a raise, so when he checks I just check, but I took a real long time to check to let him know I have a good hand. He shows JJ for a full house and I am really proud to show my two pair that I didn't bet on the river. Now the players will respect me. I also make a note that the guy with only one arm slow played top set after betting more than the pot, but checked his full house so I should probably never bet on the river against him. This guy has been really changing gears the last three sessions because he would never have played it like that before. That's why you take notes though, to keep your eye out for guys that can switch gears.Next three hands I fold to let everyone know I am playing tight. Then call with 46 suited in spades. You remember what I said about spades. Man I love it when you get good cards. Totally miss the flop, but since I am playing tight I think why not try to cash in on my table image? I go all in for $4 and get called by the cute black chick who has top pair no kicker. Man this is going to be a tough night.I re-buy for $40 now. You know all the other players are like: “Whoa, he just bought in for twice his original buy in, he must have a lot of money. And if he has a lot of money he must be good, I should respect his raises” I do this on purpose.Now I am in the BB and get dealt JJ. Two limpers so I just check to trap them. Flop comes Q 10 5 rainbow. Gin for my hand. I mean what hand limps with a Q? Right? Well apparently KQ is a limping hand to Mr. One Arm. So I rebuy again but this time for only $25. Time to show proper bankroll management.A make a couple nice plays when I get a set and two pair on flop and quickly I am up to $40. The hand with the set I did a little thing I like to think I invented, when I hit my set, I check, then if they bet I will raise. But hereís the tricky part, I check the turn like Iím on a draw, then lead out for a really small bet like I am bluffing. Unless they totally suck out on me this play works like 80-85% of the time. They call that a value bet.Get a monster AA from middle position and my M is like 4 or 8 so I decide to lead out for a standard 3xBB raise. No way they can put me on AA now. Flop comes 789 all hearts and I have A of hearts, so I bet pot and get two callers, sweet. Turn is a K that isnít a heart so I check just in case one of them has 2 hearts already. They both check. Now I donít have a clue what they could have, probably a set or a straight draw, so I decide to be careful. River is a J so unless I got really unlucky I am ahead here. I put in a small 1/3 pot bet. But remember how I bet a small amount last time I had a set, so I am totally representing here. But they both called. I am like really stoked but I missed what they had because the internet froze when I got a phone call. After my daughter calls back and gets off the phone I re-log on and try to figure out what they had but they wouldnít say and I must have lost because I only have like $12 now. That one is going to bug me for quite a while.Time to tighten up, 4 re buys is my maximum for a one hour session, so I am dangerously close to having to watch High Stakes Poker for the rest of the night. I fold like 5 hands in a row. Rocky rock rock. I could probably get them to lay down QQ to a serious re raise from me now.But then this really tough hand came up. I have 78 spades (yes) and call a minimum raise, probably aces. They should just take out a billboard that says “I Have Aces” when they min raise. So the flop is 9 10 A with the 9 a spade. Wow, this oneís big. I have an open ended straight draw, a backdoor flush draw, and a backdoor straight flush draw. Now Iím almost hoping he has AA so I can destroy him. Did I mention this is Mr. One Arm, my nemesis. This will be so much sweeter than beating the girl with the pony tail, sheís really bad. So he bets like a pot size bet so I take a moment to calculate my pot odds. I have 4 6s and 4 J to have the nuts, so thatís 8, then I have two chance to catch 2 spades, with 10 spades left I get 20 different ways to catch 2 spades ( if you donít understand this you should really read Play Poker Like the Pros, you need it). Then I have the monster straight flush draw, only needing 2 of 4 cards to make it. Thatís 50%. So I get my calculator out and figure I have about a 2:1 chance of winning and am ready to reraise all in but I got timed out and the hand got folded. They really need to lengthen the clock. The One Arm bandit shows his AA ( told you ) and I am left wondering what I would have said if I had made my hand. Probably: “Sorry dude, but next time you slow play aces you deserve to lose or something like that.”This is why I think I am going to quit trying to be a math guy and just become a feel player.So I am steaming now and decide I am not in the right frame of mind so I go over to the limit game. Limit is way easier because you can only lose like 4 BB max if youíre heads up and only make one raise. I totally dominate from the start and quickly am up 5 BBs and think: “Man I knew I should have played higher stakes. If I had played at the $300/$800 table I would up $4,000 right now.” But you canít let hindsight take you off your game. SO I left after about 20 hands, gave back a little and left up. Overall a bad night, but I think I left the other players with a feeling that they should watch out for me.So who wants to stake me and hop on this gravy train?BalloonGuy on FCP
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#2 Dratj

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:01 AM

I only read a little bit but you must be one bored millionaire.

#3 Vatche

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:01 AM

BG, you're one hilarious human being. :club:

#4 LongLiveYorke

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:21 AM

BG, this is your best post ever. Really, really hilarious stuff. This is my favorite part:

View PostBalloon guy, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 1:56 PM, said:

Now I am in the BB and get dealt JJ. Two limpers so I just check to trap them. Flop comes Q 10 5 rainbow. Gin for my hand. I mean what hand limps with a Q? Right? Well apparently KQ is a limping hand to Mr. One Arm.
I also liked when you started talking about your "M."You should celebrate your genius with a nice cigar.

#5 Chiefclint

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:22 AM

sweet read, yuo will have me trembling next time I come across ur path.

#6 Balloon guy

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:25 AM

Less talking, more stakingBalloonGuy on FCP
I use my cigar smoke as idiot repellent

Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless.
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#7 Sportsmack

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:31 AM

View PostBalloon guy, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 10:56 AM, said:

So I thought describing a typical session I play online. This should give you a glimpse into what I think is a solid foundation for a future online tensofthousandaire.1st you should know that when the poker boom first started I was skeptical and waited till there were fewer players playing online. The more players there are, the harder it is to be the best right? After the passage of the Gaming bill, I found much more manageable sized games, and the people that were there seem to be there everyday so I can really get a read on them and eventually make those huge laydowns that only top pros can make.Before I play I prepare myself by setting aside many different items that will insure my success:Paper and pencil to take notes of other players.WaterPretzelsCookies( to reward myself for good play )Calculator for pot oddsAbacus for when most of the other players are oriental ( this lets them know I am not intimidated )Computer (duh )Tissues ( sinuses )Trash can (for tissues )A few Poker Books such as Play Poker Like the Pros (duh ) Phil Gorden's Little Green Book, and the classic Professor, Banker and Suicide King. So rather than list my many philisophical ideas, basic understanding of the difference between limit and no limit ( you make and lose way more money in no limit ) and other things that give me the credits to perform at my best, I will describe last night's session, which is pretty typical of my play:I log onto my dial up, this can take up to 5 minutes so I take advantage of this time to go to the bathroom, turn on High Stakes Poker ( I have them all recorded ) and make any work calls I need to. I believe in trying to get the most out of every second of the day.I first go to Full Tilt Poker and rail some big games, I like to try to say witty things in the chat box to get the pros to notice me. This way, when I play with them later they will think: "That's the guy that always watched me play, I better be careful of him and respect his raises" Then I go to Full Contact Poker and sit down at a PLO8 $6/$12 game. I know no one else will play that level on the site, so I am safe from having to risk any money, but if any opponents are surfing around, they will see me sitting at this tougher game at a higher stake and think: "This guys a player; I should respect his raises" I of course look around at the bigger tables to do the same thing. It is important though to be 'away' while sitting at these tables since my bankroll is too small to have any serious money if front of me, and when you are away it just says 'away' with no money.Then I logged onto the $.25/$.50 no limit table for $20. This is a good table choice for me because I am way better than anyone that would play this level, so I can relax my focus if I need to and still post a winner on many nights. I used to really tear up the $.05/$.10 with like 3 or 4 BB every hour. The $20 will also protect me from any coolers like the nut flush draw vs overpair etc.First hand I post $.50 since the button is to my left. I mean come on, I didn't sit down to not play. Get dealt 96 off. First guy to act ( under the gun) raises to $2. Everyone folds so it's up to me to make sure this guy knows I am not afraid of him. I call for a discount ( Thank you Vince Van Patton ) and see the flop, hoping he has AK so I can put him on a hand. Flop comes J 9 3 two spades. Now the spades worry me because most flushes are made with spades, so I figure I better protect my hand. But I got position so I don't get the chance. This guy bets like $6. I mean come on, the pot only has like $5 in it and he bets over the pot. Looks like Mr. AK doesn't like the flop and wants me gone. Sorry bully man, there's a new Sheriff in town and his name is Balloon Guy. I raise to $12 and he calls so fast I almost type in the chat: 'AK huh?' Where do they come from? Well now I am feeling really good, but the turn in the K of hearts. Man how can I get so unlucky. He checks, but I'm not falling for that, I only bet $2 which is only 1/3 my stack so I can fold if he raises. He just smooth calls. So smooth. River is the 3 of hearts, so now I have two pair, which can beat a pair of kings, but one of the trademarks of a good player is to not bet when they can't stand a raise, so when he checks I just check, but I took a real long time to check to let him know I have a good hand. He shows JJ for a full house and I am really proud to show my two pair that I didn't bet on the river. Now the players will respect me. I also make a note that the guy with only one arm slow played top set after betting more than the pot, but checked his full house so I should probably never bet on the river against him. This guy has been really changing gears the last three sessions because he would never have played it like that before. That's why you take notes though, to keep your eye out for guys that can switch gears.Next three hands I fold to let everyone know I am playing tight. Then call with 46 suited in spades. You remember what I said about spades. Man I love it when you get good cards. Totally miss the flop, but since I am playing tight I think why not try to cash in on my table image? I go all in for $4 and get called by the cute black chick who has top pair no kicker. Man this is going to be a tough night.I re-buy for $40 now. You know all the other players are like: ďWhoa, he just bought in for twice his original buy in, he must have a lot of money. And if he has a lot of money he must be good, I should respect his raisesĒ I do this on purpose.Now I am in the BB and get dealt JJ. Two limpers so I just check to trap them. Flop comes Q 10 5 rainbow. Gin for my hand. I mean what hand limps with a Q? Right? Well apparently KQ is a limping hand to Mr. One Arm. So I rebuy again but this time for only $25. Time to show proper bankroll management.A make a couple nice plays when I get a set and two pair on flop and quickly I am up to $40. The hand with the set I did a little thing I like to think I invented, when I hit my set, I check, then if they bet I will raise. But hereís the tricky part, I check the turn like Iím on a draw, then lead out for a really small bet like I am bluffing. Unless they totally suck out on me this play works like 80-85% of the time. They call that a value bet.Get a monster AA from middle position and my M is like 4 or 8 so I decide to lead out for a standard 3xBB raise. No way they can put me on AA now. Flop comes 789 all hearts and I have A of hearts, so I bet pot and get two callers, sweet. Turn is a K that isnít a heart so I check just in case one of them has 2 hearts already. They both check. Now I donít have a clue what they could have, probably a set or a straight draw, so I decide to be careful. River is a J so unless I got really unlucky I am ahead here. I put in a small 1/3 pot bet. But remember how I bet a small amount last time I had a set, so I am totally representing here. But they both called. I am like really stoked but I missed what they had because the internet froze when I got a phone call. After my daughter calls back and gets off the phone I re-log on and try to figure out what they had but they wouldnít say and I must have lost because I only have like $12 now. That one is going to bug me for quite a while.Time to tighten up, 4 re buys is my maximum for a one hour session, so I am dangerously close to having to watch High Stakes Poker for the rest of the night. I fold like 5 hands in a row. Rocky rock rock. I could probably get them to lay down QQ to a serious re raise from me now.But then this really tough hand came up. I have 78 spades (yes) and call a minimum raise, probably aces. They should just take out a billboard that says ďI Have AcesĒ when they min raise. So the flop is 9 10 A with the 9 a spade. Wow, this oneís big. I have an open ended straight draw, a backdoor flush draw, and a backdoor straight flush draw. Now Iím almost hoping he has AA so I can destroy him. Did I mention this is Mr. One Arm, my nemesis. This will be so much sweeter than beating the girl with the pony tail, sheís really bad. So he bets like a pot size bet so I take a moment to calculate my pot odds. I have 4 6s and 4 J to have the nuts, so thatís 8, then I have two chance to catch 2 spades, with 10 spades left I get 20 different ways to catch 2 spades ( if you donít understand this you should really read Play Poker Like the Pros, you need it). Then I have the monster straight flush draw, only needing 2 of 4 cards to make it. Thatís 50%. So I get my calculator out and figure I have about a 2:1 chance of winning and am ready to reraise all in but I got timed out and the hand got folded. They really need to lengthen the clock. The One Arm bandit shows his AA ( told you ) and I am left wondering what I would have said if I had made my hand. Probably: ďSorry dude, but next time you slow play aces you deserve to lose or something like that.ĒThis is why I think I am going to quit trying to be a math guy and just become a feel player.So I am steaming now and decide I am not in the right frame of mind so I go over to the limit game. Limit is way easier because you can only lose like 4 BB max if youíre heads up and only make one raise. I totally dominate from the start and quickly am up 5 BBs and think: ďMan I knew I should have played higher stakes. If I had played at the $300/$800 table I would up $4,000 right now.Ē But you canít let hindsight take you off your game. SO I left after about 20 hands, gave back a little and left up. Overall a bad night, but I think I left the other players with a feeling that they should watch out for me.So who wants to stake me and hop on this gravy train?Balloon Guy on FCP
Any chance DN will let you write his blogs from here on out? :club:
QUOTE (TwstdWrstr @ Thursday, April 2nd, 2009, 3:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Only two more tables until you achieve poker orgy! Chips will be flying every which way, nonstop suck outs galore, and you won't know where you blew your stack but damn it'll be a great night.

#8 Balloon guy

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:32 AM

View PostSportsmack, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 11:31 AM, said:

Any chance DN will let you write his blogs from here on out? :club:
Im too contreversial, and my spelling is bad
I use my cigar smoke as idiot repellent

Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless.
Milton Friedman

#9 StupidKid

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:33 AM

Absolutely hilarious. That is all.

#10 JoeyJoJo

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:34 AM

View PostBalloon guy, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 10:56 AM, said:

Abacus for when most of the other players are oriental ( this lets them know I am not intimidated )I first go to Full Tilt Poker and rail some big games, I like to try to say witty things in the chat box to get the pros to notice me. This way, when I play with them later they will think: "That's the guy that always watched me play, I better be careful of him and respect his raises" He just smooth calls. So smooth.Next three hands I fold to let everyone know I am playing tight.I re-buy for $40 now. You know all the other players are like: ďWhoa, he just bought in for twice his original buy in, he must have a lot of money. And if he has a lot of money he must be good, I should respect his raisesĒ I do this on purpose.I fold like 5 hands in a row. Rocky rock rock. I could probably get them to lay down QQ to a serious re raise from me now.
The whole thing was great.I really liked the above parts.
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Moe: Yeah?
Homer: See, I got this friend named... Joey Jo Jo... Junior... Shabadoo.
Moe: That's the worst name I ever heard.

#11 cwik

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:37 AM

View PostLongLiveYorke, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 11:21 AM, said:

BG, this is your best post ever. Really, really hilarious stuff. This is my favorite part:I also liked when you started talking about your "M."You should celebrate your genius with a nice cigar.
QFT

#12 fleung22

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:39 AM

I don't think anybody was more dissapointed with the lack of FCPHUL - Season 2 than Balloon Guy.I guess this is the substitute for wire taps of Daniel's Cheap Thieves meetings. I wish I had TOTD archives back then.


#13 cubsfan44

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:47 AM

:club: had me laughing out loud
What if the 'HOKEY POKEY' really IS what it's ALL about?

#14 milojones

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:48 AM

saw how long it was and said "no way am going to finish this" but just too funny not to. is balloon guy really a multi-millionaire.. everyone seems to think so. where did the money come from? always interested in people much richer than i am.
"It can be argued that man's instinct to gamble is the only reason he is still not a monkey up in the trees." -Mario Puzo

#15 blakheart

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 11:49 AM

NH,sir

#16 yourboygsarida

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 12:09 PM

id like to steak you if possible. I really like your style of play and would like to hear more about the check then raise play that you said you made up, it sounds like it has possibilities. Only weakness I really see in your play is you don't use the all in button enough. That always works, at least on tv. maybe we can talk about a deal. thanks.

#17 nutzbuster

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 12:09 PM

:D I'll stake ya buddy.Ruths Chris or Sizzler? :club:



F Cancer

#18 AAsnake88

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 12:15 PM

View Postnutzbuster, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 3:09 PM, said:

:D I'll stake ya buddy.Ruths Chris or Sizzler? :club:
Sizzler obv.
QUOTE (Jordan @ Tuesday, December 23rd, 2008, 10:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
this month can suck my left nut. need to not play when so tilted and wanting to stab a pumpkin

#19 Figger

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 12:18 PM

View Postmilojones, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 2:48 PM, said:

saw how long it was and said "no way am going to finish this" but just too funny not to. is balloon guy really a multi-millionaire.. everyone seems to think so. where did the money come from? always interested in people much richer than i am.
Posted Image
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#20 milojones

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Posted 07 March 2007 - 12:29 PM

View PostFigger, on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007, 12:18 PM, said:

Posted Image
haha, it certainly is a lifetime goal of mine
"It can be argued that man's instinct to gamble is the only reason he is still not a monkey up in the trees." -Mario Puzo




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