The African American Advantage

[turd ferguson 1]

I'm starting this thread to discuss something that has been on my mind for quite some time now. Over the past few years that I've been playing, it's become increasingly obvious that African Americans have a distinct advantage over the rest of the playing field. Mods, please at least read this before you decide to lock it up. This is in no way racist. It's simple fact.I have come to this conclusion after much thought, and my reasoning is as follows. First of all, African Americans have darker skin than the rest of us which makes it much harder, if not impossible, to pick up tells. If the card room is poorly lit or there is even the slightest shadow there is no way to distinguish features on their faces, much less pick up a tell. Secondly, they're just flat out more intimidating than white people. Who is apt to make you more nervous: A skinny old white guy or some young African American with gangster clothes on who may or may not be packing heat? I think the answer is obvious. The African American's fold equity is exponentially higher than that of his Caucasian counterpart. I know I'm not going to be calling down any bluffs from a black guy. You think I want to get a cap busted in my ass? No sir.My last argument proves to be slightly more intangible, and thus, harder to prove, but I think that if you keep an open mind you'll see where I'm coming from. I have noticed that while sitting next to an African American at the poker table that I become lightheaded and often have ended up with a headache. At first I dismissed this as coincidence, but then I realized something. African Americans have much wider nostrils than people of other races. Therefore they breathe more air, and diminish the air supply for the rest of the people at the table. If you've sat at a table with three or more African Americans I'm sure you've experienced this. Now, everyone knows that without oxygen the brain works less efficiently. It becomes harder to think, reason, and make the correct decisions without proper oxygen intake. This is yet another advantage that the African American has over white people.I have submitted this argument to my local state representative, and have asked him to consider writing a bill that would propose the banning of African Americans from poker rooms around the country. I personally have no problem with African Americans. In fact, one of my friends is Honduran, and that's close enough. The simple fact is that they simply have too much of an advantage over the rest of the people in the card room. It's unfair, and I'm finally speaking up about it. Discuss.

[speedz99 145]

That is, without a doubt, the most accurate post ever written. And I'm not racist at all (I have a friend from South Africa...he's white, but close enough).

[The Czar 0]

Seriously, pretty funny though. I especially liked the "close enough" part. The PC police should be arriving shortly, though.

[Zilla 0]

as group x would say wtf mate...

[turd ferguson 1]

That is, without a doubt, the most accurate post ever written. And I'm not racist at all (I have a friend from South Africa...he's white, but close enough).

Thank you. I can personally vouch for your non-racist nature. I mean, you're a Jew, for Christ sake.

Seriously, pretty funny though. I especially liked the "close enough" part. The PC police should be arriving shortly, though.

This is a serious issue. Something has to be done.

[randy 0]

that is so funny i think i just soiled myself.

[The Czar 0]

I just emailed Barack Obama, our Senator. Hopefully he has an open mind. I think he's black, but his last name is Obama, so who knows?

[randy 0]

I just emailed Barack Obama, our Senator. Hopefully he has an open mind. I think he's black, but his last name is Obama, so who knows?

ignoring it would be racist against us open minded white people. p.s. Jews have big noses too. Maybe we should get Mel Gibson to help us get them off the tables as well.

[Mercury69 3]

I think someone is writing a new poker book called The Darwinism of Poker. I jeard it's going to be published by Grand Wizard Publishing.

[The Czar 0]

This is destined for a locking.

[pdaconq9 0]

http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

My last argument proves to be slightly more intangible, and thus, harder to prove, but I think that if you keep an open mind you'll see where I'm coming from. I have noticed that while sitting next to an African American at the poker table that I become lightheaded and often have ended up with a headache. At first I dismissed this as coincidence, but then I realized something. African Americans have much wider nostrils than people of other races. Therefore they breathe more air, and diminish the air supply for the rest of the people at the table. If you've sat at a table with three or more African Americans I'm sure you've experienced this. Now, everyone knows that without oxygen the brain works less efficiently. It becomes harder to think, reason, and make the correct decisions without proper oxygen intake. This is yet another advantage that the African American has over white people.

I was thinking the same thing about all the Jews I play with here in South Florida. I was just discussing this online with my good friend Mel Gibson, and he agrees with me.He is considering greenlighting a new movie. The Passion for the Oxygen.

ignoring it would be racist against us open minded white people. p.s. Jews have big noses too. Maybe we should get Mel Gibson to help us get them off the tables as well.

damn you for beating me to the punch

[randy 0]

damn you for beating me to the punch

ahaha, whos your daddy.

[TheWatchMan 0]

the ops a moron, its not evenm funny

[The Czar 0]

the ops a moron, its not evenm funny

Not even a little bit?

[esem 0]

I'm starting this thread to discuss something that has been on my mind for quite some time now. Over the past few years that I've been playing, it's become increasingly obvious that African Americans have a distinct advantage over the rest of the playing field. Mods, please at least read this before you decide to lock it up. This is in no way racist. It's simple fact.I have come to this conclusion after much thought, and my reasoning is as follows. First of all, African Americans have darker skin than the rest of us which makes it much harder, if not impossible, to pick up tells. If the card room is poorly lit or there is even the slightest shadow there is no way to distinguish features on their faces, much less pick up a tell. Secondly, they're just flat out more intimidating than white people. Who is apt to make you more nervous: A skinny old white guy or some young African American with gangster clothes on who may or may not be packing heat? I think the answer is obvious. The African American's fold equity is exponentially higher than that of his Caucasian counterpart. I know I'm not going to be calling down any bluffs from a black guy. You think I want to get a cap busted in my ass? No sir.My last argument proves to be slightly more intangible, and thus, harder to prove, but I think that if you keep an open mind you'll see where I'm coming from. I have noticed that while sitting next to an African American at the poker table that I become lightheaded and often have ended up with a headache. At first I dismissed this as coincidence, but then I realized something. African Americans have much wider nostrils than people of other races. Therefore they breathe more air, and diminish the air supply for the rest of the people at the table. If you've sat at a table with three or more African Americans I'm sure you've experienced this. Now, everyone knows that without oxygen the brain works less efficiently. It becomes harder to think, reason, and make the correct decisions without proper oxygen intake. This is yet another advantage that the African American has over white people.I have submitted this argument to my local state representative, and have asked him to consider writing a bill that would propose the banning of African Americans from poker rooms around the country. I personally have no problem with African Americans. In fact, one of my friends is Honduran, and that's close enough. The simple fact is that they simply have too much of an advantage over the rest of the people in the card room. It's unfair, and I'm finally speaking up about it. Discuss.

THIS IS NO WAY RACIST. IT'S A SIMPLE FACT ( WHAT!!!!)

[turd ferguson 1]

the ops a moron, its not evenm funny

It's not supposed to be funny. PM me your address so I can send you a copy of the petition. I need 500,000 signatures.

[SwamiSwan 0]

I guess they'd be better nascar drivers and hockey players too, dammit.seriously, they seem to have more disadvantages--> they bluff more and get called more because of their over reliance on the 'intimidation factor' you just described, white *** honkey mf better lay them cards down, etc etcand ace deuce "suit me up" is actually a fairly crappy starting hand; usually AA's consider it a lock.

[The Czar 0]

On a serious note, Phil Ivey does benefit from endorsements because of his race. That is definitely a fact. I've never heard Negreanu compared to Tiger Woods...

[turd ferguson 1]

THIS IS NO WAY RACIST. IT'S A SIMPLE FACT ( WHAT!!!!)

If you haven't noticed these things then you just aren't very observant. I would venture a guess that you're probably either A. A poor poker player or B. An African American.

[thehidden 0]

Thank you. I can personally vouch for your non-racist nature. I mean, you're a Jew, for Christ sake. This is a serious issue. Something has to be done.

i don't really agree with your arguments but i don't think you are bigoted or anyhting. One thing i have found that works live with pretty much any player who tends to wear baggy clothing is to look for the breathing tell. it's noticable when then shirt is flapping because he's panting haha

[Ron_Mexico 4,219]

ahaha, whos your daddy.

not you, mine was funnier.I'm just serious.You did beat me though.hats off

[turd ferguson 1]

i don't really agree with your arguments but i don't think you are bigoted or anyhting. One thing i have found that works live with pretty much any player who tends to wear baggy clothing is to look for the breathing tell. it's noticable when then shirt is flapping because he's panting haha

See that's the thing about these African Americans. They don't have to breathe hard because of their big nostrils. They can easily consume the amount of oxygen they need as well as the rest in their immediate area without even trying.

[Abbaddabba 0]

I imagine that in some parallel universe, black people are posting on an afro-centric poker board jokingly proposing that casinos ban white people to keep the stink of wet dog out of the card rooms.

[SBriand 4]

i don't really agree with your arguments but i don't think you are bigoted or anyhting. One thing i have found that works live with pretty much any player who tends to wear baggy clothing is to look for the breathing tell. it's noticable when then shirt is flapping because he's panting haha

Now that is valuable info. Though how can you deny TF's reasoning?