14 replies to this topic

[ricker]

I know mine isn't as great as some of the brilliance that has been posted on here, but I thought I'd share mine....enjoy.....Rizoss23: hey man, i was jus wonderin if there is any way u could stake or loan me a few bucks on pokerstars, nothing big, and I will pay back + some winnings. Also, if you want to collude, buy an ebook, or buy a pokerbot, then I can sell you one. I got your name off a poker forum or sometin 1 time. Just any chance?RickerKioz: how do I know you're legit?Rizoss23 returned at 3:51:56 PM.Rizoss23: I can give you an ebook or sometin, give me a small amt. so you kno im legitRizoss23: Um... what else can I do?RickerKioz: do you want a steak or do you want a handout?Rizoss23: StakeRickerKioz: there's a difference between the twoRizoss23: or loanRickerKioz: how do I know I'm not just throwing my money down the tubes?RickerKioz: what steaks do you play?Rizoss23: I either want you to loan me a small sum that I can play with at ring and pay back that amt. plus someRizoss23: Or I want a stake in a tourney of your choicingRizoss23: 70/30 chop or sometinRickerKioz: what steaks do you play?Rizoss23: I play .50/1 and 1/2 NL ring cash is my best, but I'm not asking you to give me money for thatRizoss23: Especially with not knowing meRizoss23: I will play as low as you want so you can see im legit or whatever you needRickerKioz: if you can play online already, why do you need a steak?RickerKioz: I've never even heard of steaks onlineRizoss23: stakes*RickerKioz: but I guess this is the internet agesRizoss23: it isRizoss23: Im 19, no way to put money online reallyRickerKioz: where did you get this im name?Rizoss23: Im not sure actually, buddy of mine who stakes me gave me a few forums and a few namesRickerKioz: okRizoss23: i actually think you were from a forum thoRickerKioz: well, let me quiz youRizoss23: OkayRickerKioz: Say you have A 3 suited UTG, what do you do?Rizoss23: UTG?Rizoss23: fold it.RickerKioz: WRONGRizoss23: how so?RickerKioz: sorryRickerKioz: got away from meRizoss23: Huh?RickerKioz: okRizoss23: its weak if 2 or more other players in handRickerKioz: it's the first hand of the World Series of Poker, seven players go all in before you and you look down at AARickerKioz: what do you do?Rizoss23: hm..Rizoss23: I'll be honest, this is probably wrong, But I callRizoss23: I lose with AA all the time, but odds are I winRickerKioz: WRONGRizoss23: u should fold, i knoRickerKioz: same situation, but this time it's 2 7 offsuitRickerKioz: call or fold?RickerKioz: there's a time limitRickerKioz: 5RickerKioz: 4RickerKioz: 3RickerKioz: 2RickerKioz: 1Rizoss23: FoldRickerKioz: WRONG! WRONG WRONG WRONG!!Rizoss23: Um.. dudeRickerKioz: how am I supposed to stake a losing playerRizoss23: I'd beat you heads up any day RickerKioz: I'd be throwing my money down the toliet if this is how you're respondingRickerKioz: okRickerKioz: last chanceRizoss23: kRizoss23: gimme 10RickerKioz: if you get this right, I'll steak you in the Super WednesdayRickerKioz: ok?Rizoss23: kRickerKioz: okRizoss23: askRickerKioz: I'm typing jackass let me get it out beforeRizoss23: kRickerKioz: you tell me what to doRickerKioz: this is a big steakRizoss23: kRickerKioz: and you're ruining it by going too quicklyRizoss23: kRickerKioz: you have to let the steak marinateRickerKioz: let it simmerRickerKioz: go over it make sure you consider all the anglesRizoss23: AlrightRickerKioz: okRickerKioz: now, you're at the final table of a major online tourney, you have half the chips in play and only four players left including yourselfRizoss23: okRickerKioz: WRONG!RickerKioz: goddammitRizoss23: lolRickerKioz: I told you to wait for the questionRickerKioz: forget itRizoss23: im waitingRickerKioz: nopeRizoss23: kRizoss23: good dayRickerKioz: you ruined itRizoss23: Ur a ****ing idiot RickerKioz: you're the one folding 7 2 offsuitRizoss23: hahhahRickerKioz: it aint' called the HAMMER for nothingRizoss23: stake me a lil, play wit meRickerKioz: let me thinkRizoss23: colludeRickerKioz: let me quiz you on some poker termsRickerKioz: UTG means what?Rizoss23: dont knoRickerKioz: that's okRickerKioz: it means under the giraffeRizoss23: lolRizoss23: nextRickerKioz: I' m seriousRickerKioz: MPRizoss23: kRickerKioz: do you know what that means?Rizoss23: i duno, lolRickerKioz: Mr Pussy...it describes anyone who limps inRizoss23: cooRickerKioz: okRickerKioz: BBRizoss23: big blindRickerKioz: actuallyRickerKioz: most people think it stands for Big BlindRickerKioz: and they're closeRickerKioz: it actually comes from Big BettyRizoss23: oRickerKioz: Big betty used to only sit in the second seatRickerKioz: back when the dealer button didn't moveRickerKioz: she was a big player back in the dayRizoss23: i dont kno history, im 19RickerKioz: okRickerKioz: that's okRickerKioz: part of me steaking you would be me teachign you as wellRickerKioz: make sense?RickerKioz: Rizoss23: good, mentor meRickerKioz: that's what I'm trying to doRizoss23: watch me playRickerKioz: where do you play at?Rizoss23: PokerstarsRickerKioz: I'm currently boycotting pokerstarsRickerKioz: wish I couldRizoss23: where you play?RickerKioz: joeysRizoss23: linkRickerKioz: it's a card room here in JerseyRickerKioz: very hush hushRizoss23 signed off at 4:11:07 PM

[HangukMiguk]

BIG BETTY!wow...between you and napa, we're going to have new terminology for every position in poker.

[wsox8]

RickerKioz: now, you're at the final table of a major online tourney, you have half the chips in play and only four players left including yourselfRizoss23: okRickerKioz: WRONG!I thought that and the Big Betty part was funny.. I actually laughed out loud a little.. good stuff..

[cu in 4years Dan]

haha that guy is totally sucking up to you just hoping he still has a chance, even though his chance is gone, classic.you were making fun of him and hes still saying things like:oklolyeahme too

[Napa_Don]

ricker, on Wednesday, June 7th, 2006, 3:12 PM, said:

RickerKioz: UTG means what?Rizoss23: dont knoRickerKioz: that's okRickerKioz: it means under the giraffeRizoss23: lol

That is all, nh sir.

[RhinestoneCowboy]

cu in 4years Dan, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 2:18 AM, said:

All I was asking for was 10 bucks, you didn't have to be such an asshole.

FYP..

[Marc-O]

You made me laugh out loud at work... not good ... haha

[gkunit20]

That was absoloutly hilarious. Wow.

[Petoria]

I just told him to "go to hell"

[ricker]

Petoria, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 2:14 PM, said:

I just told him to "go to hell"

he just im'ed you?

[Actuary]

risker:if I ever ever ever dog on you for something stupid you say, just link me to this.great impromptu dialogue.if you are making this up, shame on you, but damn it's funny.

[ricker]

Actuary, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 3:34 PM, said:

risker:if I ever ever ever dog on you for something stupid you say, just link me to this.great impromptu dialogue.if you are making this up, shame on you, but damn it's funny.

'First off, my name is Ricker...but that's ok...I have fat fingers too.and two, yes, this was all off the cuff. Things like this is actually how I make a living. Well living is a stretch, but I do get paid to do things like this.

[Dirtydutch]

RickerKioz: okRickerKioz: BBRizoss23: big blindRickerKioz: actuallyRickerKioz: most people think it stands for Big BlindRickerKioz: and they're closeRickerKioz: it actually comes from Big BettyRizoss23: oRickerKioz: Big betty used to only sit in the second seatRickerKioz: back when the dealer button didn't moveRickerKioz: she was a big player back in the dayRizoss23: i dont kno history, im 19WP.

[Petoria]

ricker, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 4:17 PM, said:

he just im'ed you?

He did at about 2 pm. I only said 3 words to him, "go to hell"his response, "yes sir".

[HangukMiguk]

bump, if anyone gets one of these clowns again, give them my IM.I have plenty of good ideas...