Jump to content


I Called In Sick Today


  • Please log in to reply
214715 replies to this topic

#151041 El Guapo

El Guapo

    Like A Boss!

  • Members
  • 16,439 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Carmen's Flower

Posted 25 April 2009 - 08:43 AM

View PostTactical Bear, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 9:24 AM, said:

Oh yeah? Well I made out with a drunken cougar on the dance-floor last night.
I'm curious. You're somewhere between 24-26 IIRC. What age is a cougar to you?

#151042 Tactical Bear

Tactical Bear

    Happy Hallowang

  • Members
  • 4,220 posts
  • Location:Hiding

Posted 25 April 2009 - 09:09 AM

View PostEl Guapo, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 12:43 PM, said:

I'm curious. You're somewhere between 24-26 IIRC. What age is a cougar to you?
I probably play it fast and loose with the term cougar, but the woman last night could have been anywhere from 30-40. I would have guessed about 33, though.
Quack, Qua-...

I mean, RAAAAAAWWWR!

#151043 El Guapo

El Guapo

    Like A Boss!

  • Members
  • 16,439 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Carmen's Flower

Posted 25 April 2009 - 09:15 AM

For me, for a woman to be a cougar I think they would physically have to be able to be your mother. So at an absolute minimum 10-12 years older than you.

#151044 jeff_536

jeff_536

    What?

  • Members
  • 30,877 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 25 April 2009 - 09:41 AM

When I was 28, i started dating my boss, who was 40 at the time.
Into The Fire, chronicling the adventure.

My New Blog

#151045 Ron_Mexico

Ron_Mexico

    You mess with the bull, you'll get the horns

  • Members
  • 24,443 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Barry Manilow's closet

Posted 25 April 2009 - 10:07 AM

View Postbrvheart, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 3:57 AM, said:

Where has Cindy been? She would find the old story like lightning. Also, most of the checks I write are business related. Certainly your business customer write a tons of checks?
Cindy is good like that, although at first, I thought you meant Idaho, but then I realized that was before your time.Some businesses write lots of checks, sure, but some dont. It's not a necessity now as much as it used to be.

View PostNikki_N, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 9:45 AM, said:

Is she single?
No, thankfully. She's not sexually attractive to me, and wasn't before the pregnancy. And now, yuck. Preggo chicks are gross.

View PostDawson Leery, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 11:49 AM, said:

Oh and by the way...STUFFED a 29 year old babe last night, swagger's back, fuck going on dates
Nice. Where did you finish? Please don't say "in the rubber" You have to pull out, yank off the rubber and cum on her.

View PostTactical Bear, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 12:24 PM, said:

Oh yeah? Well I made out with a drunken cougar on the dance-floor last night.
Ewww, on the dance floor, with everyone watching? You're that dude?

View PostTactical Bear, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 1:09 PM, said:

I probably play it fast and loose with the term cougar, but the woman last night could have been anywhere from 30-40. I would have guessed about 33, though.
eff you

View Postjeff_536, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 1:41 PM, said:

When I was 28, i started dating my boss, who was 40 at the time.
Just as long as he treated you right
I make $31,000 dollars a year and I have a home.

#151046 Sal Paradise

Sal Paradise

    shot down in a blaze of glory

  • Members
  • 6,811 posts
  • Location:Sausalito
  • Favorite Poker Game:cuddling

Posted 25 April 2009 - 10:25 AM

damn it, it's all nice and hot outside but I'm all hungover and I can't get off the couch.also: women hate me (still).
QUOTE (Tactical Bear @ Monday, June 15th, 2009, 9:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Anybody who dies of Swine Flu is just a faggot.

#151047 El Guapo

El Guapo

    Like A Boss!

  • Members
  • 16,439 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Carmen's Flower

Posted 25 April 2009 - 10:36 AM

View PostRon_Mexico, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 11:07 AM, said:

Nice. Where did you finish? Please don't say "in the rubber" You have to pull out, yank off the rubber and cum on her.
LOL. Dawson doesn't use condoms. He is immune to STD's and has impeccable control over his sperm as to only impregnate on command.

#151048 LadyGrey

LadyGrey

    I've never even seen this part of Pussytown before!

  • Members
  • 5,903 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:OXFORD
  • Favorite Poker Game:Favorite Ninja Turtle: Favorite Salad Dressing:

Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:12 PM

****ing crazy huge storm here right now. Could be a tornado soon, there's heavy rotation nearby. Someone has been hit by lightning. Strat's shift just started at McDs and I came with him because he doesn't have a basement and I don't know what to do in case of a tornado. While we were walking over there was constant deafening lightning overhead. We ran inside. I am a baby and pretty scared.
We are all so complicated, and then we die. We are a subject one day, with our vanities, our loves, our worries, and then one day, abruptly, we become nothing but an object, an absolutely disgusting pile of shit. We pass very quickly from one stage to the next. It's very bizarre. It will happen to all of us, and fairly soon too. We become an object you can handle like a stone, but a stone that was someone.
— Christian Boltanski



Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.
— Jon Stewart

#151049 Theraflu

Theraflu

    I like beer.

  • Members
  • 5,760 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Boston
  • Interests:Addictions

Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:17 PM

View PostLadyGrey, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 4:12 PM, said:

****ing crazy huge storm here right now. Could be a tornado soon, there's heavy rotation nearby. Someone has been hit by lightning. Strat's shift just started at McDs and I came with him because he doesn't have a basement and I don't know what to do in case of a tornado. While we were walking over there was constant deafening lightning overhead. We ran inside. I am a baby and pretty scared.
It's 79 and beautiful here. Reffed outside for about 4 hours today, got some sun, came home and grilled some lemon chicken. Just a nice day all around. Also, don't worry about the storm. Lightning doesn't strike Brits.
Marital Aids.

#151050 LG's Touch

LG's Touch

    Poker Forum Newbie

  • Members
  • 51 posts

Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:28 PM

Just after I posted that they closed the McDs and we are now in the basement.

#151051 El Guapo

El Guapo

    Like A Boss!

  • Members
  • 16,439 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Carmen's Flower

Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:30 PM

View PostLG's Touch, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 4:28 PM, said:

Just after I posted that they closed the McDs and we are now in the basement.
Is Jeff back now, he just told me he was leaving a few minutes ago?

#151052 LadyGrey

LadyGrey

    I've never even seen this part of Pussytown before!

  • Members
  • 5,903 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:OXFORD
  • Favorite Poker Game:Favorite Ninja Turtle: Favorite Salad Dressing:

Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:33 PM

View PostEl Guapo, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 6:30 PM, said:

Is Jeff back now, he just told me he was leaving a few minutes ago?
Huh? I don't know what you mean. They're reopening now and we're not in the basement anymore. Much lighter outside now. I'm going to stick around here a little longer and finish my apple pie.
We are all so complicated, and then we die. We are a subject one day, with our vanities, our loves, our worries, and then one day, abruptly, we become nothing but an object, an absolutely disgusting pile of shit. We pass very quickly from one stage to the next. It's very bizarre. It will happen to all of us, and fairly soon too. We become an object you can handle like a stone, but a stone that was someone.
— Christian Boltanski



Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.
— Jon Stewart

#151053 El Guapo

El Guapo

    Like A Boss!

  • Members
  • 16,439 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Carmen's Flower

Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:40 PM

View PostLadyGrey, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 4:33 PM, said:

Huh? I don't know what you mean. They're reopening now and we're not in the basement anymore. Much lighter outside now. I'm going to stick around here a little longer and finish my apple pie.
Oh I thought you were at the dorm or something. Didn't realize you were at McD's and that they had a basement.Hey Bean, or anyone else, have any of you installed unfinished hardwood floors? How much extra work is it? Is it worth it to save 1 - 2 dollars per sqft?

#151054 Poppy_Hillis

Poppy_Hillis

    Poker Forum Veteran

  • Members
  • 3,872 posts

Posted 25 April 2009 - 03:53 PM

View PostLadyGrey, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 3:33 PM, said:

Huh? I don't know what you mean. They're reopening now and we're not in the basement anymore. Much lighter outside now. I'm going to stick around here a little longer and finish my apple pie.
I hate this GD place. Tornado hit just outside East Lawrence on I-70.

#151055 LadyGrey

LadyGrey

    I've never even seen this part of Pussytown before!

  • Members
  • 5,903 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:OXFORD
  • Favorite Poker Game:Favorite Ninja Turtle: Favorite Salad Dressing:

Posted 25 April 2009 - 04:08 PM

View PostPoppy_Hillis, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 6:53 PM, said:

I hate this GD place. Tornado hit just outside East Lawrence on I-70.
Yeah I'm glad it's left Lawrence, looks like we just have storms on the way now. Back in strat's house now and he's working. Finally I can eat my dinner. I feel gross for having eaten two apple pies there while I was shelterin'.
We are all so complicated, and then we die. We are a subject one day, with our vanities, our loves, our worries, and then one day, abruptly, we become nothing but an object, an absolutely disgusting pile of shit. We pass very quickly from one stage to the next. It's very bizarre. It will happen to all of us, and fairly soon too. We become an object you can handle like a stone, but a stone that was someone.
— Christian Boltanski



Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.
— Jon Stewart

#151056 Tactical Bear

Tactical Bear

    Happy Hallowang

  • Members
  • 4,220 posts
  • Location:Hiding

Posted 25 April 2009 - 04:17 PM

View PostRon_Mexico, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 2:07 PM, said:

Ewww, on the dance floor, with everyone watching? You're that dude?
Usually I'm the exemplar of class and discretion, but a confluence of circumstances caused me to act out of character. The woman was attractive, she was drunk, and she made the first move. Also, I am an embarrassingly bad dancer, so it was probably better for everyone that I was making out instead of grooving. My friends were watching, too, so I figured I owed it to them. In other news, I got cut off at the same bar last night. I have not had an alcoholic drink in 2+ years, with the notable exception of a few accidental wedding-beers. I think the final straw was when I moved a folding table that was propped against the fence on the patio from inside the fence to outside. I thought it was funny. The waitresses did not. I was planning on taking care of them if they were good sports, but they were not, and refused me service when I went to purchase a beer for a friend. Wang: "Excuse me?"Bartender: "I said you're cut off. As in no more drinks."Wang: "On what grounds?"Bartender: "You're obviously wasted."Wang: "Prithee, what the **** are you talking about?"Bartender: (hands on hips) "You heard me."Wang: "How about this: ask me to spell any word."Bartender: "What?"Wang: "W-H-A-T."Bartender: "..."Wang: "Can I at least have some water?"Bartender: "No."Wang: "You are the worst bartender ever."At that point, I rounded up my gang, put a folding chair on the outside of the fence, and left. My girlfriend for the night seemed disappointed, but she may just have been drunk. I had some fun developments today, but I'll share them iff they bear any humorous fruit.
Quack, Qua-...

I mean, RAAAAAAWWWR!

#151057 Sal Paradise

Sal Paradise

    shot down in a blaze of glory

  • Members
  • 6,811 posts
  • Location:Sausalito
  • Favorite Poker Game:cuddling

Posted 25 April 2009 - 05:14 PM

View PostTactical Bear, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 8:17 PM, said:

Bartender: "You're obviously wasted."
Wang: "No ma'am, I'm just an idiot."that's what I would've said.(I don't think you're an idiot.)I'm going to the moose lodge!
QUOTE (Tactical Bear @ Monday, June 15th, 2009, 9:37 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Anybody who dies of Swine Flu is just a faggot.

#151058 El Guapo

El Guapo

    Like A Boss!

  • Members
  • 16,439 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Carmen's Flower

Posted 25 April 2009 - 06:03 PM

Currently my daughter is throwing the mother of all fits. It is now a battle of wills......oooh, we won as I was typing.Wang, I am curious as to what caused you to fall off the wagon after two years? (I don't count the occasional wedding beer or champagne toast)

#151059 hank213

hank213

    it takes determination to be a drunk

  • Members
  • 7,048 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:a bar or under my desk

Posted 25 April 2009 - 06:08 PM

View PostEl Guapo, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 8:03 PM, said:

Currently my daughter is throwing the mother of all fits. It is now a battle of wills......oooh, we won as I was typing.Wang, I am curious as to what caused you to fall off the wagon after two years? (I don't count the occasional wedding beer or champagne toast)
That's how I read it at first, but I don't think he did. That's why he was so incredulous when he was informed he was "cut off."
Hank's tenure at Soulsuckers, INC, LLC, DBA TBD, had not been long, but it had been distinguished... By drunkenness, hair-trigger violence, and a total lack of performance. I would call it a steady decline in performance, but that would imply that he performed at one point in time. In fact he had not. He was drunk.

QUOTE (Napa_Don @ Monday, August 15th, 2011, 5:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Last week I drink the majority of a twelve pack of light beer out of the cutoff end of a whiffle bat, how's that for cultured, bitches"

#151060 Tactical Bear

Tactical Bear

    Happy Hallowang

  • Members
  • 4,220 posts
  • Location:Hiding

Posted 25 April 2009 - 07:01 PM

View PostEl Guapo, on Saturday, April 25th, 2009, 10:03 PM, said:

Wang, I am curious as to what caused you to fall off the wagon after two years? (I don't count the occasional wedding beer or champagne toast)
No, it was funny because I don't drink. I wasn't drinking last night, which was why it was hilarious I got cut off.Gotta run. Wish me luck on not going crazy tonight. Ashley: "Awww, don't you think thunderstorms are so romantic?" Wang: "Okay. I will see you in a few."
Quack, Qua-...

I mean, RAAAAAAWWWR!




13 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 9 guests, 0 anonymous users


    Google, Google Mobile