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I Called In Sick Today


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#197921 iZuma

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 12:22 PM

oh and suited if it makes you feel any better I'm still in love with that girl from work and she still hates me and I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend now, so you know, I'm still a very unhappy person. if it makes you feel any better.

#197922 JubilantLankyLad

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 12:37 PM

View PostDJ Vu, on 20 August 2012 - 12:09 PM, said:

"your mouth isn't sweaty."
moist though
there were no special effects, no special effects.

#197923 SuitedAces21

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 12:47 PM

View PostiZuma, on 20 August 2012 - 12:22 PM, said:

oh and suited if it makes you feel any better I'm still in love with that girl from work and she still hates me and I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend now, so you know, I'm still a very unhappy person. if it makes you feel any better.
it does make me feel better, thanks. mainly because i can foresee a day, a few years from now, when this place is down to just you and me. you and me and our misery. i just don't wanna be the last one left.

#197924 Napa Lite

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 12:49 PM

HOLY SHIT THEY'RE RUNNING WIRES BECAUSE GD MICE WERE EATING THROUGH THEM AND THE MUTHER F'N MICE ATTRACTED SNAKES AND SO THERE'S BEEN MUTHER F'N SNAKES IN OUR CEILING LIKE A GD SAMUEL L JACKSON SEQUEL JESUS CHRIST IM WORKING IN SHAKES HOUSE

#197925 SuitedAces21

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 01:02 PM

ENOUGH is ENOUGH! i've had it with these stories about mother****ing snakes in that mother****ing ceiling. everybody strap in, we're gonna open some ****ing windows.

#197926 Tiltinagain

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 02:02 PM

View PostNapa Lite, on 20 August 2012 - 12:49 PM, said:

HOLY SHIT THEY'RE RUNNING WIRES BECAUSE GD MICE WERE EATING THROUGH THEM AND THE MUTHER F'N MICE ATTRACTED SNAKES AND SO THERE'S BEEN MUTHER F'N SNAKES IN OUR CEILING LIKE A GD SAMUEL L JACKSON SEQUEL JESUS CHRIST IM WORKING IN SHAKES HOUSE
I enjoyed this a little too much

View PostRon_Mexico, on 06 October 2012 - 09:40 AM, said:


Sheesh, tough crowd, sensitive crowd.

QUOTE (speedz99 @ Thursday, October 6th, 2011, 11:33 AM)
Fine...when god dies, I'll be ok with people being upset on facebook.

#197927 Theraflu

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 02:16 PM

At least they found the snakes before mongeese starting running around up there.
Marital Aids.

#197928 DJ Vu

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 02:55 PM

Posted Image

#197929 ShakeZuma

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 03:20 PM

what

View PostNapa Lite, on 20 August 2012 - 12:49 PM, said:

HOLY SHIT THEY'RE RUNNING WIRES BECAUSE GD MICE WERE EATING THROUGH THEM AND THE MUTHER F'N MICE ATTRACTED SNAKES AND SO THERE'S BEEN MUTHER F'N SNAKES IN OUR CEILING LIKE A GD SAMUEL L JACKSON SEQUEL JESUS CHRIST IM WORKING IN SHAKES HOUSE
well this makes me feel better

View PostAmScray, on 30 August 2010 - 12:41 PM, said:

one cannot possibly ascribe themselves to the larger (D) philosophy without first being a poon

#197930 DJ Vu

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 03:22 PM

View PostShakeZuma, on 20 August 2012 - 03:20 PM, said:

what
Right?

#197931 ShakeZuma

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 04:07 PM

oh dj vu you're so weirdwell now that we've got that throwaway comment out of the way let's get back to talking about me: I'm going to the beach tomorrow after work. gonna spend a couple days down there eating and napping. I'm not really in a good mood so I don't foresee any fun being had but at least I won't be at work I guess.

View PostAmScray, on 30 August 2010 - 12:41 PM, said:

one cannot possibly ascribe themselves to the larger (D) philosophy without first being a poon

#197932 JubilantLankyLad

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 04:09 PM

You're aware it's the middle of the week, right? Maybe we've hit on why you're not climbing the corporate ladder.
there were no special effects, no special effects.

#197933 DJ Vu

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 04:13 PM

View PostShakeZuma, on 20 August 2012 - 04:07 PM, said:

I'm not really in a good mood so I don't foresee any fun being had...
Wait a minute, I thought you had sex recently. I don't know if I can trust tilt's theory anymore.I just opened some junk mail. It was a survey for something. There was a crisp dollar bill included. Still didn't do the survey. Unrelated: there was an article on Cracked (!) about insane writing and some guy's diary was the equivalent of 500 novels. He basically wrote down every single thing he did. Sometimes it was "I'm writing in my diary."Edit because I know you want to hear more:"7 a.m.: I cleaned out the tub and scraped my feet with my fingernails to remove layers of dead skin.""7:05 a.m.: Passed a large, firm stool, and a pint of urine. Used five sheets of paper."

#197934 Speedziphone

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 04:32 PM

View PostSuitedAces21, on 19 August 2012 - 05:17 PM, said:

what's there to say really. i'm not a man. i never will be.
Sorry friendo. It's hard to make a move when out of practice. I recommend drinking more heavily next time.

View PostInternetExplorer, on 19 August 2012 - 07:08 PM, said:

Good man. Thanks.

#197935 ShakeZuma

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 04:37 PM

View PostJubilantLankyLad, on 20 August 2012 - 04:09 PM, said:

You're aware it's the middle of the week, right? Maybe we've hit on why you're not climbing the corporate ladder.
they won't miss me

View PostDJ Vu, on 20 August 2012 - 04:13 PM, said:

Wait a minute, I thought you had sex recently. I don't know if I can trust tilt's theory anymore.
yeah it hasn't helped at all strangely enough.5 sheets has never in my life been enough

View PostAmScray, on 30 August 2010 - 12:41 PM, said:

one cannot possibly ascribe themselves to the larger (D) philosophy without first being a poon

#197936 JubilantLankyLad

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 04:56 PM

View PostShakeZuma, on 20 August 2012 - 04:37 PM, said:

5 sheets has never in my life been enough
try upgrading to legal pads
there were no special effects, no special effects.

#197937 Speedziphone

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 05:11 PM

You know I'm walking along with my dog right now and wondering if the voice function for texting would also work for the forum. I feel like there's a good chance it would even though I'm not going to bother to put in any kind of midsentence punctuation and there'll probably be a bunch of mistakes that I'm not going to go back and fix. That said I'm kind of bored and don't really feel like calling anyone maybe I'll just walk along and talking to my phone and force you all to read it you know I suppose you're not all forced to do it but you're going to anyways especially now that NASA has changed his avatar so you'll know this is coming for me. The only question is what I should talk about. I've made a huge mistake. Nevermind. Turns out I have nothing to say about anything. Although I suppose I could walk down the street wondering aloud about what happened that Suited from making sweet sweet love to his lady friend possibly in the shower although I'm not sure I remember why showers came off in the whole equation. I'm guessing he was waiting for that signal girls get Wednesday turn to you and say that they want you to start having sex with them. Believe me when I tell you that this rarely happens unless your shake and said woman is a newly single mother. And whatever happens to the days when Mexico would chime in with his advice which would RuPaul around stories about him pushing girls to their sexual limits which made me mildly uncomfortable?

#197938 Tiltinagain

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 05:14 PM

View PostDJ Vu, on 20 August 2012 - 04:13 PM, said:

Wait a minute, I thought you had sex recently. I don't know if I can trust tilt's theory anymore.
I think we can all agree that shake is a unique case. I mean, he had sex on consecutive weekends and both times the "trip report" had the same tone as someone having to put down a puppy.

View PostRon_Mexico, on 06 October 2012 - 09:40 AM, said:


Sheesh, tough crowd, sensitive crowd.

QUOTE (speedz99 @ Thursday, October 6th, 2011, 11:33 AM)
Fine...when god dies, I'll be ok with people being upset on facebook.

#197939 Speedziphone

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 05:16 PM

Well I just want back and read that while walking and it's pretty horrible but I'm going keep going because the only alternative is to walk along and enjoy the sounds of nature which are particularly grating to me tonight. I'm kind of hoping that my car will get totaled so I can go out and buy a new one. I mean the new one will be a piece of shit but new cars are Fun regardless even when they're 10-year-old pieces of shit. I wonder how well this dictation program works. You think you can say things like. I don't knowLet's see how this works. Wow you can say things like. And it will make it. In their sentence for you. Then you can say things like(I just said new paragraph).Worst post ever.

#197940 Tiltinagain

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Posted 20 August 2012 - 05:16 PM

View PostSpeedziphone, on 20 August 2012 - 05:11 PM, said:

You know I'm walking along with my dog right now and wondering if the voice function for texting would also work for the forum. I feel like there's a good chance it would even though I'm not going to bother to put in any kind of midsentence punctuation and there'll probably be a bunch of mistakes that I'm not going to go back and fix. That said I'm kind of bored and don't really feel like calling anyone maybe I'll just walk along and talking to my phone and force you all to read it you know I suppose you're not all forced to do it but you're going to anyways especially now that NASA has changed his avatar so you'll know this is coming for me. The only question is what I should talk about. I've made a huge mistake. Nevermind. Turns out I have nothing to say about anything. Although I suppose I could walk down the street wondering aloud about what happened that Suited from making sweet sweet love to his lady friend possibly in the shower although I'm not sure I remember why showers came off in the whole equation. I'm guessing he was waiting for that signal girls get Wednesday turn to you and say that they want you to start having sex with them. Believe me when I tell you that this rarely happens unless your shake and said woman is a newly single mother. And whatever happens to the days when Mexico would chime in with his advice which would RuPaul around stories about him pushing girls to their sexual limits which made me mildly uncomfortable?
Huh

View PostRon_Mexico, on 06 October 2012 - 09:40 AM, said:


Sheesh, tough crowd, sensitive crowd.

QUOTE (speedz99 @ Thursday, October 6th, 2011, 11:33 AM)
Fine...when god dies, I'll be ok with people being upset on facebook.




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