CodyHartman 0 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Seeing how Im "not funny," I think it is fitting that I start a lame joke thread. Post any lame, not funny joke you know.What do you do when you are born with 2 belly buttons?Donate one to the naval reserve. Link to post Share on other sites
dEv~ 19 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Wanna hear a dirty joke?Pig fell in the mud. Link to post Share on other sites
kers2 0 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Yea so this guy walked into a bar...ouch Link to post Share on other sites
Turbo Dog 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" Link to post Share on other sites
ShakeZuma 586 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Have you ever seen an elephant hiding in a tree?They hide pretty well, don't they Link to post Share on other sites
turd ferguson 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 There once was a woman from Nantucket... Link to post Share on other sites
DonkSlayer 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Two Sunnis are about to have tea in Bagdhad. One's already at the table, and the other arrives a bit late. As the 2nd arrives, the first sniffs hard and says "Oooh, what's the smell?" The 2nd Sunni says "Oh, there was a mosque bombing on the way over here, and I think I stepped in some Shiite." Link to post Share on other sites
CrackofmyACE 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 What does an elephant use as a tampon?A sheep Link to post Share on other sites
CodyHartman 0 Posted February 27, 2006 Author Share Posted February 27, 2006 Why dont cannibals eat comedians?They taste funny Link to post Share on other sites
timwakefield 69 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 I think this joke is hysterical, but some people think it's lame:Here's my impression of the guy who invented hotcakes: "THE SALES ARE UNPRECEDENTED!" Link to post Share on other sites
Golden 2 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 A baby seal walks into a club. Link to post Share on other sites
CodyHartman 0 Posted February 27, 2006 Author Share Posted February 27, 2006 How do you say five drowning guys in spanish?Quatro cinco Link to post Share on other sites
Suited_Up 2 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 I think this joke is hysterical, but some people think it's lame:Here's my impression of the guy who invented hotcakes: "THE SALES ARE UNPRECEDENTED!"LOL... It made me laugh, I don't know why.Here's mine....Two peanuts were walking down the street......One was Assaulted. Link to post Share on other sites
gkunit20 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 What do you call a Yugo on a hill?A yugo on a hill.What do you call two Yugos on a hill?A mirageWhat do you call three Yugos on a hill?That's not a hill Link to post Share on other sites
Suited_Up 2 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Did you hear about the new pirate movie???It's rated Aarrrrrrrr!! Link to post Share on other sites
davezz5 0 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Two parrots sanding on a perch, one Parrot turns to the other and says"i smell something fishy". Link to post Share on other sites
LongLiveYorke 38 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 A dog goes to the telegram office, took out a form, and wrote: "Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof."The telegram clerk examined the paper and said, "You only used 9 words. You could write another woof for the same price."The dog responded, "Yeah, but that would make no sense at all." Link to post Share on other sites
gkunit20 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 A dog goes to the telegram office, took out a form, and wrote: "Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof."The telegram clerk examined the paper and said, "You only used 9 words. You could write another woof for the same price."The dog responded, "Yeah, but that would make no sense at all."That was kinda funny. Move it. Link to post Share on other sites
fryer98 30 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, you have a steering wheel in your pants!"The pirate says "Argh, it's driving me nuts!" Link to post Share on other sites
Whiskey16 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 How do you say five drowning guys in spanish?Quatro cincoWow. It's definitely not funny. It might have a chance, if you try telling it with 4 guys, since the translation works better, but you're right, you're not funny. Link to post Share on other sites
nopunk 0 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 I think this joke is hysterical, but some people think it's lame:Here's my impression of the guy who invented hotcakes: "THE SALES ARE UNPRECEDENTED!"Funnest joke I've heard in weeks.Great stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
Whiskey16 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, you have a steering wheel in your pants!"The pirate says "Argh, it's driving me nuts!"Fryer, you wanna go see the new pirate movie this weekend?It's rated, ARRRRRRRRRRRGH! Link to post Share on other sites
fryer98 30 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 A string walks into a bar and says "Can I have a beer?"The bartender asks "Are you a string?"The string says "Yes."The bartender replies "We don't serve strings here."The string goes out in the parking lot, rolls around, ties himself up, and comes back in the bar. He says "Can I have a beer?"The bartender says "Are you a string?"The string replies "I'm a fraid knot."----------------------------------------------------------------------------------Two olives are sitting on a wall. One falls off, the other one yells down "Are you gonna be alright?"The one that fell off says "Olive!" Link to post Share on other sites
gkunit20 1 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 One bee is buzzing around looking for some flowers when he runs into his friend. His friend tells him of a bar-mitzvah going on around the bend, so he goes. He sees his friend soon after. "Thanks for the tip" he says. "No problem. Say, what's that on your head?" His friend asks. "Oh, that's my Yamulka." ""Why are you wearing a yalmuka?" His friend asks.To which the first bee responds:I didn' want them to think I was a WASP. Link to post Share on other sites
Suited_Up 2 Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Fryer, you wanna go see the new pirate movie this weekend?It's rated, ARRRRRRRRRRRGH!Umm... I think I already said that, lol. Link to post Share on other sites
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