pezeveng 207 Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 A Mormon was seated next to an Irishman on a flight from London. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for a whiskey, which was promptly brought and placed before him.The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a drink. He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips." The Irishman then handed his drink back to the attendant & said " Me too. I didn't know we had a choice." Link to post Share on other sites
Jeepster80125 0 Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 nice, that's a new one to me. Link to post Share on other sites
El Guapo 10 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 This was e mailed to me today, I snickered a bitFresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds" Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I asked. "They will grow larger over a period of years," my husband replies. I stopped. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?" Without missing a beat he says, "Worked for your butt, didn't it?" Link to post Share on other sites
NonZeroPossibility 0 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Wha?... This isn't the "Official Joke of the Day Thread"?... I'm out.Ah, what the hell, I got a really good one anyway:Three mice are sitting in a bar. The first one exclaims, "I am one bad-ass mouse! In my hood, we have huge mousetraps. I take the damn cheese out of the traps and move the bar up and down while I eat."The second one chimes in with, "Oh yeah. Well, I'm a bad-ass mouse too. In fact, I'm such a bad-ass mouse, that in my hood, I mix rat poison with my milk and chug it down every night before I go to bed."The third gets up and starts to leave. The other two mice both yell out, "Hey chicken, where do you think you're going?"The third one replies, "Going home to f u c k the cat." Link to post Share on other sites
chrozzo 19 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 too funnyty Link to post Share on other sites
Cappy37 0 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Blond girl takes a taxi downtown.Soon as they hit the destination, she tells the driver, "Sir, I'm terribly sorry but I have no money to pay you with."She lifts up her skirt to reveal that she isn't wearing any underwear and hints coyly, " Maybe we can work something out?"Cab driver takes one look in the backseat and replies, "Ma'am, do you have anything smaller?" Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now