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New Tip & Wag From The Colbert Report


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And my gut is telling me that this isn't gonna work out.Maybe your gut's just saying you're hungry or...Oh, no, no, no, no. It's telling me that you're overqualified for this job.I'm really not that smart.No offense, sweetie, but you don't have any experience on a newspaper. You're TV.Well, I'm trying to make my transition to print journalism.Ah. Why?Well, newspapers are the last watchdogs of our government. They enforce the checks and balances. And one half-hour of TV only adds up to...OK. All right. Define irony.Irony. Uh...Irony. It's a noun. It's when something is ironic. It's, uh... Well, I can't really define irony but I know it when I see it!.....Oh, my god. I've never been so glad to see anyone in my entire life. This day has been the biggest nightmare. I mean, these job interviews, Troy...the word vivisection, a staggering understatement. Can you define irony?It's when the actual meaning is the complete opposite from the literal meaning.Yeah. My god.

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A bunch of idiots dancing on a plane to a song made famous by a band that died in a plane crash.

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It's when the actual meaning is the complete opposite from the literal meaning.
Meh. That movie's only decent at best. And I've never thought that this was that good a definition. Maybe it describes verbal irony, but it misses the other types that are just as much fun.
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Meh. That movie's only decent at best. And I've never thought that this was that good a definition. Maybe it describes verbal irony, but it misses the other types that are just as much fun.
Oh yeah? Well you loved the Transformers movie!Hey everyone, Yorke loved Transformers!
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Oh yeah? Well you loved the Transformers movie!Hey everyone, Yorke loved Transformers!
Ummm... I liked it too. Not that it was a gripping story or anything, but the Camaro was awesome... among other things.
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Ummm... I liked it too. Not that it was a gripping story or anything, but the Camaro was awesome... among other things.
...things like this?421356489_d42aad756b.jpgEdit: Stupid non-link pics...fixed now, I think.
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its like havinf no more condoms when tara ried shows up at your door drunk and naked
In NO way is this a problem for me. And I'm definitely not kidding. I would gladly risk herpes for the ability to tell the story of me banging Tara Reid to my friends while knowing I'm not lying. Well, maybe a prerequisite would be that I be allowed to record it on my video camera.
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