216655 replies to this topic

[Ron_Mexico]

so check this out yo, me and my boy Terrell Owens was chillin in the A.T.L last wizzeak, and right before I fired up a fatty, dis security guard came over frontin on us cuz we just rolled a Dolly Madison truck and our pockets was burstin with individual cherry pies and shiznet. 5 oh rolls up and say you didn't pay for those, T.O. gets down and starts doin crunches right in da man's grill, OH SCHNAP, 5 oh ditn't know what to do, so he bounced harder than the checks my mama used to write at da grocery sto. We was po fo sho. We only had two mercedes and one hummer, but nun was tricked out WCC style.Anywayz, we was gettin mad high from da sugar and jelly fillin, then I got all crazy like and started smearing powder sugar all over T.O's abs and tryin to lick it off. He thought I was straight trippin'. I was like, T.O., yo, dis is how we rep it in da D to the C yo. Straight not straight style. So he bounces too. Weak ass_ punk ass_ trick ass_ btch. So now, I'm all alone waiting for da maid to clean up da dolly madison mess, damn chica was late, so I got out da celly and dialed up immigration on her fool self. Then I got high, cuz it was time to get high. I called home all high, and my family pet ran head first into a tree. They say it was an accident, but think that fool tried to kill hisself. He was drepressed when I tried to teach him gang signs.Audi yo

[Timdog1010]

speedz99, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 11:10 AM, said:

I wasn't trying to mock...I really am excited that I remembered that. She was really hot, and very good in (dream) bed.

the best (dream) sex I ever had was Kirstie Alley - years ago when she was on Cheers & I was in high school.do what you will with that information.

[Ouch-8s]

Ron_Mexico, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:15 PM, said:

Ron is bilingual

Congratulations.

[turd ferguson]

Ron_Mexico, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:15 PM, said:

Anywayz, we was gettin mad high from da sugar and jelly fillin,

Bahahahahahha...:pauses for a breather face:...ahahahahaha! Matt may have just been passed up in the POTD race.

[speedz99]

Timdog1010, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:16 PM, said:

the best (dream) sex I ever had was Kirstie Alley - years ago when she was on Cheers & I was in high school.do what you will with that information.

What, you mean masturbate? Because that's what I was planning on doing with the information. Or was that implied in your statement? Maybe I'm beating off a dead horse here.

[Timdog1010]

speedz99, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 11:21 AM, said:

What, you mean masturbate? Because that's what I was planning on doing with the information. Or was that implied in your statement? Maybe I'm beating off a dead horse here.

actually I don't care what you do with it.I'm just trying to goad you into posting so that I can look at the multicolored a.sses.mmmmmmmm... multicolored a.sses...

[Randy Reed]

Ron_Mexico, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 11:15 AM, said:

so check this out yo, me and my boy Terrell Owens was chillin in the A.T.L last wizzeak, and right before I fired up a fatty, dis security guard came over frontin on us cuz we just rolled a Dolly Madison truck and our pockets was burstin with individual cherry pies and shiznet. 5 oh rolls up and say you didn't pay for those, T.O. gets down and starts doin crunches right in da man's grill, OH SCHNAP, 5 oh ditn't know what to do, so he bounced harder than the checks my mama used to write at da grocery sto. We was po fo sho. We only had two mercedes and one hummer, but nun was tricked out WCC style.Anywayz, we was gettin mad high from da sugar and jelly fillin, then I got all crazy like and started smearing powder sugar all over T.O's abs and tryin to lick it off. He thought I was straight trippin'. I was like, T.O., yo, dis is how we rep it in da D to the C yo. Straight not straight style. So he bounces too. Weak ass_ punk ass_ trick ass_ btch. So now, I'm all alone waiting for da maid to clean up da dolly madison mess, damn chica was late, so I got out da celly and dialed up immigration on her fool self. Then I got high, cuz it was time to get high. I called home all high, and my family pet ran head first into a tree. They say it was an accident, but think that fool tried to kill hisself. He was drepressed when I tried to teach him gang signs.Audi yo

Where is Ron and what have you done with him. Please just give him a jelly do, hit that arse, then give him back.

[Habs Fan]

Ron_Mexico, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 11:15 AM, said:

so check this out yo, me and my boy Terrell Owens was chillin in the A.T.L last wizzeak, and right before I fired up a fatty, dis security guard came over frontin on us cuz we just rolled a Dolly Madison truck and our pockets was burstin with individual cherry pies and shiznet. 5 oh rolls up and say you didn't pay for those, T.O. gets down and starts doin crunches right in da man's grill, OH SCHNAP, 5 oh ditn't know what to do, so he bounced harder than the checks my mama used to write at da grocery sto. We was po fo sho. We only had two mercedes and one hummer, but nun was tricked out WCC style.Anywayz, we was gettin mad high from da sugar and jelly fillin, then I got all crazy like and started smearing powder sugar all over T.O's abs and tryin to lick it off. He thought I was straight trippin'. I was like, T.O., yo, dis is how we rep it in da D to the C yo. Straight not straight style. So he bounces too. Weak ass_ punk ass_ trick ass_ btch. So now, I'm all alone waiting for da maid to clean up da dolly madison mess, damn chica was late, so I got out da celly and dialed up immigration on her fool self. Then I got high, cuz it was time to get high. I called home all high, and my family pet ran head first into a tree. They say it was an accident, but think that fool tried to kill hisself. He was drepressed when I tried to teach him gang signs.Audi yo

I giggled like a schoogirl.

Timdog1010, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 11:16 AM, said:

the best (dream) sex I ever had was Kirstie Alley - years ago when she was on Cheers & I was in high school.do what you will with that information.

While we're on the topic of dreams, I dreamt that my girlfriend got new cans for her birthday, which is today.Unfortunately, it was the WORST CAN JOB EVAR. They we're like ice cream cones, like, like fucking breastsickles ore something.Soft, runny, ice cream breastsickles. Horrible.When I woke up I checked them out just to be sure.

[speedz99]

Habs Fan, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:29 PM, said:

Soft, runny, ice cream breastsickles. Horrible.

I need to borrow this for my sig. It's just too good to leave on a random page.

[missIdaho]

"breastsickles" I like that. Good word. I'll have to find a way to use it in conversation some time today.

[Randy Reed]

Ok, so I was unsure all week about posting my confession. As the thread was in full hilarity, I was kinda surprised that Daniel didn't get the humor in speedz sig and thread. I felt he probably never even read the thing and being on the fly it went over his head. I have to admit I think Daniel has a great sense of humor and was praying he would "get" it once I emailed him.When I left work that day I told the girlfriend about the thread and what I had done. She was really unsure about what I had done as well. So I/we were both amazed that he not only "got" it, but how far he went with it. I knew going in that it had great potential to be one of the best posts here yet, so I was major relieved and amazed how great it turned out.Another reason I posted that I did it was to dispel all the spy conspiricies surrounding the post, figuring you guys would rather know it was me rather than some "mod" checking in on us or something.

[turd ferguson]

speedz99, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:32 PM, said:

I need to borrow this for my sig. It's just too good to leave on a random page.

You need to change your title to just "Goulet!" All that other stuff is too much. Save it for the sig.

[WKTSWAY]

speedz99, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:25 PM, said:

Ok, I've added every name I can think of. I hate leaving anyone out but I'm done. Feel free to post about how I'm an asshole if you were left out.

asshole!I don't post on here enough though... I spend too much time catching up cause I can't get to it at work. By then, all the good jokes have been taken.

[speedz99]

Randy Reed, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:33 PM, said:

When I left work that day I told the girlfriend about the thread and what I had done. She was really unsure about what I had done as well.

The few times I've tried to tell my girlfriend about this forum, she has said the following to me, verbatim:"Matt, I don't care."To be fair, I say that to her (except for the "Matt" part) whenever she talks about stupid shit. I'll just go ahead and assume that it's good we are honest with each other.(did I use "verbatim" correctly?)

[Ron_Mexico]

damn, I had something to type but forgot. oh yeah, I very rarely, if ever, remember my dreams.I know andi texted me last night at 12:45am and tried to engage me in a dirty text convo. Little did she know that I had just had an orgasm from my own doing 20 minutes earlier, and I see absolutely no value of dirty texting because I would get Carpel Tunnel before I ever could come. She then sent me two texts that aroused me and I still feel asleep. I told her to call me but she isn't ready for that step yet. All this time and effort I put in supporting our troops. I'm a regular Bob Hopehopefully I haven't said too much. haha. Hey, where is Naked Cowboy, I'll tell his secrets now. hahaha. he's shy, so cute

[Timdog1010]

WKTSWAY, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 11:36 AM, said:

asshole!I don't post on here enough though... I spend too much time catching up cause I can't get to it at work. By then, all the good jokes have been taken.

would you like 'breastsickles'?I'm sure Speedz wouldn't mind sharing...

[speedz99]

turd ferguson, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:34 PM, said:

You need to change your title to just "Goulet!" All that other stuff is too much. Save it for the sig.

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you're the boss of me.

[turd ferguson]

speedz99, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:37 PM, said:

The few times I've tried to tell my girlfriend about this forum, she has said the following to me, verbatim:"Matt, I don't care."To be fair, I say that to her (except for the "Matt" part) whenever she talks about stupid shit. I'll just go ahead and assume that it's good we are honest with each other.(did I use "verbatim" correctly?)

My girlfriend tries to be polite, but I know she's just wishing I would shut up. I'm pretty sure you used "verbatim" correctly, but I don't know things.

[speedz99]

Timdog1010, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 12:37 PM, said:

would you like 'breastsickles'?I'm sure Speedz wouldn't mind sharing...

Yeah, you can have it. I have just been ordered to change around my avatar, profile, and sig.

[missIdaho]

Timdog1010, on Thursday, June 8th, 2006, 2:16 PM, said:

the best (dream) sex I ever had was Kirstie Alley - years ago when she was on Cheers & I was in high school.do what you will with that information.