Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 chance napa shows her his dark secret? Does he even have a boat house? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 More like I'm just not going to text her and will probably end up drunk and hitting on my friends friends and will text that one chick who recently started texting me again. Ron, you're like that cool uncle that everybody kinda holds there breath at the reunion once you start drinking. Drunk uncle. Speedz is the cool cousin who slipped you beer at your other cousins wedding. Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 I've got a pontoon I can pitch a tent on, no pun intended. Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Does he even have a boat house? Well, he's got the shoes, so I assume so. Wouldn't make much sense if he didn't. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Ron, you're like that cool uncle that everybody kinda holds there breath at the reunion once you start drinking. Drunk uncle. Speedz is the cool cousin who slipped you beer at your other cousins wedding. I do not accept this It is only true if I'm really bombed Wait, says the guy on YouTube threatening to shit on people's chests. My worst offense is throwing hooks to the ribs Link to post Share on other sites
Essay21 2,385 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 That sucks nap. Bitches be crazy. Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Ron I wish I had a drunk uncle. My family's super conservative. You would be that guy at my family gatherings. Link to post Share on other sites
hank213 1,823 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 raining blood - slayer alien blueprint - rollins band this love - pantera profits of doom - clutch here's where the story ends - the sundays just call me uncle touchy. don't be afraid, i didn't mean to scare you. so help me jesus. Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Ron I wish I had a drunk uncle. My family's super conservative. You would be that guy at my family gatherings. I'll fck a cousin. Seriously I intend to write all of these songs down on a legal pad. Listen to them twice and then make a decision. I'm taking this serious Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 But seriously, napa, you gotta ask for tit pics. Am I the only ashole that does this? Ask for the sale A B C Always Be Closing. Fck those girls. What are they bringing to the table? NOTHING Link to post Share on other sites
The Ocho 970 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 How is you're response not "oh that sucks, I guess you'll just have to text me pics of your tits instead" Link to post Share on other sites
hank213 1,823 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 tittays. Link to post Share on other sites
Essay21 2,385 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 boobs are the tits. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 How is you're response not "oh that sucks, I guess you'll just have to text me pics of your tits instead" Isn't this what I said? Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Guys I'm really sad about this and I wish I had the balls to text that. Link to post Share on other sites
Essay21 2,385 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 it's only after you've lost everything that you're free to do anything. never forget that nap. Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 What the fck is stopping you? Is she your BFF? Are you gonna hear from her again? Do you have any real chance with her? No So do it. Nothing to lose 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Theraflu 1,035 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Goldfinger - Superman Sublime - Don't Push Ron should just listen to all of Yeezus to see that the only other person who thinks of vaginas the same way as him is a rich crazy black man in love with himself. Let's get this bitch shakin' like Parkinson's. Tool - Pushit - live. You might know the original, and as a whole, its probably better than the live version, which is like 3 minutes slower/longer...but the last 3 minutes, everyone just goes nuts, and its amazing. AFI - Sacrifice Theory. Or Days of the Phoenix. Both off the same album. I hate making song lists. Link to post Share on other sites
NickCave 194 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 A while back my ex came stumbling in with a guy who was so BROTASTIC that I could smell the Lacoste on him from two flights down. When she came in it was pretty clear to me she was blacked out. We had, until that point, had a civil relationship. I'm not sure what you guys would have done, but I, a few (shockingly few) beers in at 130AM, hopped up and asked her a question. She couldn't answer, so I asked the guy a question. He answered with something super BROTASTIC like, "Fuuuuuck bro don't cockblock me with this ho I SUPPORT ! I SUPPORT ARSENAL!" Anyway, I politely asked him if I could have a word with my ex. He refused. My ex fell into a wall. I then insisted. He still refused. My ex looked at me like a giraffe. I asked him to leave. He, of course, refused. I decided to explain exactly what my concerns were, outlining exactly why I was uncomfortable, emphasizing that it had nothing to do with my ex being my ex, but rather that she was a female that obviously had no idea who she was or what was happening, and, given my ex and my's previous agreement to not bring pussy home, I was justifiably concerned. He looked at me like an animal that looks like a bro who's like, "WHAT MOTHAFUUCKA? WHAT WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO FAAAAAAG?!" He came at me, kinda, so, being way less hammered than him (and I was a little hammered, but only a little), I grabbed him and directed him towards the exit. He fell down a flight of stairs, seriously, on his own. I called an ambulance and the police. When the cops and ambulance showed up, I let them inside, and they saw my ex passed out in a pool of her own vomit. Seriously, in her hair and everything. Just horrible. They pretty much had to take her to the hospital, of course. When she got out the next morning, she spite-cancelled the internet because she decided it was somehow my fault. I JUST LEARNED MY CITY HAS A FREE WIFI NETWORK AND IT KIND OF WORKS ON MY PORCH AROUND SUNRISE. HEY! But, seriously though, bitches, right? Link to post Share on other sites
NickCave 194 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Man, I bet you guys said all sorts of funny stuff, and I kind of want to read it, but I feel like I have about 30 minutes to open/copy every ESPN.COM article written in the past 10 days and also torrent enough porn to get me through the week. I have no idea what affects this free internet. Clouds? Sunspots? This one bird that is pretty much raping that other bird on the front steps of the church across the street? Link to post Share on other sites
Ron_Mexico 4,219 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Next time, let her get raped 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 ****ing porn-blocking bro-birds. Link to post Share on other sites
JubilantLankyLad 1,957 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Going on vacation. Probably not going to die. Link to post Share on other sites
Tiltinagain 973 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 One hundred and f'ucking seven degrees here today. When we're having a big outside BBQ party. There is a 4 acre pond for cooling off in but good lawd this is going to be a miserable day. Good on you Nick for taking care of her when she couldn't take care of herself. Sucks that you had to though. Link to post Share on other sites
Napa Lite 3,278 Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Got way to drunk. Threw up a few times this morning. I can't drink like I used to. I made breakfast but I can't eat it. I feel like such shit right now. This sucks. Link to post Share on other sites
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