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I Called In Sick Today


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and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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HE SAID LEATHER AND SHAME

 

I enjoyed this.

 

 

girl just texted me and said that she's going to be really pissed if I don't show up because she's been looking forward to screwing me all week.

 

 

 

 

hahaha of course that's a lie. but I do have to poop.

 

 

that's the truth.

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LLY, do you find yourself welcome in a greater number of circles due to being a super genius?

 

 

Not really. And by "not really," I mean not at all.

 

Though a famous musician is crashing at my apartment tonight, so that's cool. And by "famous," I mean not that famous.

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Run well grasshopper.

 

I've forgotten the game, apparently, not sure on the structure, 1,2,5? Pot limit, you can bet the pot.

 

I like the buy in of 75% of the big stack if someone has a huge stack. That's cool.

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So, shouldn't blinds just be 1-5? What's the point of the 1/2 if its 5 to bring in? It's been a while since I played that game.

 

I did like razz, oddly enough.

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Judging by your avatar, I'm going to assume it's that guy from radiohead.

 

actually it's the tambourine player from broken social scene's nephew but that doesn't mean yorke can't blow him. so, you know, give him a break.

 

They're setting up the table now. So all systems appear to be a go. 1 2 5 with a max 500 or 75% of the big stack buy in.

 

this shit's gibberish.

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OH SHIT. remember the broad from last weekend? getting a divorce, two kids obviously, really cute? well she just sent me a friend request. I accepted, but I want to send her a message letting her know that the D is in stow. looking for some advice here.

 

 

gonna ignore it, but still.

 

 

 

shit's raining cats and dogs here. fucking hurricanes in winter and shit.

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guys of course I'm going to bang her lets not be silly. I'm trying to figure out the perfect message to send after the friend request; that's the hard part. I'm thinking of going with: "yeah, you're hot. can't wait to bang."

 

 

suited it's a good thing you're a lawyer and make a lot of money outside of poker.

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nah haven't banged this one yet. this one's new as of last weekend. I mean she's in the same group of friends as the married bitch that I was banging before, but I hadn't met her until last weekend. shit's cray ynahmean.

 

 

I think I've decided the best response is no respnonse. especially considering I just spelled response like that. but seriously. I can't come up with anythin decent so I'm just going to go to bed. and I'm having trouble typing out basic english to just you guys so I'm pretty sure I'm making the right decisiont

 

 

give me some pointers for a response tomrrow though. you niggers know I can't do it on my own.

 

 

 

edit haha I said niggers thats not appropriate

 

edit 2 seriouysly shake that's not cool

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