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I Called In Sick Today


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and after 3 days, he is risen!

If you are paying $20 for a haircut, I imagine people assume you did it yourself anyway.

Pocket change cost me my first and only black girlfriend.   It was in the middle of a roaring poker boom and I was flush in ways most men don't even bother dreaming of. Money, it was like dirt to me

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Yeah, I agree....Im still trying to figure out what the brag was on the scrambled eggs question, thoughIve been in the middle of an all-out war against moles for the last several years....I wont divulge my failed tactics due to regulations on explosives and toxic waste disposal, but I can tell you how I finally ran the bastards offMole ChasersI started off with a couple around the house and they worked just like advertised.... they moved to a new area of the yardAs of now, I have probably forty spread around the premisesIts hard to keep a straight face when the neighbor complains about the sudden increase in moles on his property.... I wont tell him because he will just buy a more powerful model and run them back over hereJust be sure and bury them low enough to avoid the mower blades and triangulate their location to the nearest inch using a permanent benchmarks such as a tree and the corner of the house....Write the measurements down and keep in a safe place, or youll be like me earlier this spring and stagger around the property with a metal detector trying to find the bastards for battery replacementSure has been slow around here since LGs plane went down and Voltmeter got religion
The mole chasers are plastic so don't use a hammer to put them in the ground or they will break into a hundred pieces.My favorite option for gophers is the Roto3000 or whatever it was called but for a cheaper method get some cholorine tablets from the local pool chop and insert them in the tunnel and fill with water.It's definately not eco-safe but highly effective since it will create a gas that will likely kill most of your pets if not yourself as well.
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Went to a cool local music venue called the Fraze and seen a local band called the Menus whom i've known for years. $5 I can't get McNuggets for that. Great timeand actually drank 3 beers again. It's becoming a weekend habit, lol.fray.jpg

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Finally got Deb going yesterday and rode 23 miles. This is bridge actually I-71 going from Cinti to Columbusjust north of Kings Island and not a bridge you want to go over if you're scared of heights.Great bike path though.bridge1.jpg

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Were you watching Young People Fcking? I enjoyed that movie.
trying to find some wank material.How sexy is that Diora Baid? Wowzers. Nice bags.diora-baird-maxim-03.jpg
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Yeah, just spray some in and fire it up....Never try adding gas from a bottle or something while the engine is turning over.... one small backfire and the whole container will igniteIve probably told this before, but I got the bright idea to try and keep a two forty Z engine running by trickling gas from a cup into the carbs once....Stop, drop, and roll is a fine idea that probably works as long as you can remember doing it while running down the driveway trailing flamesMy first instinct after the fireball engulfed me was to run like hell.... My mailbox is exactly a quarter of a mile away and I cover the distance in thirteen five at one twenty twoMy pre stage burnout helped quite a bitAlways use a spray bottle for that reasonI have some time later this evening and will research the method to retrieve the trouble codes from the ecm on it....what year/make/model is it again?
I feel a little guilty because I laughed when I read about you setting yourself on fire. I'm sure I don't personally want you to catch fire, it's just the retelling of the scenario amused me. Did you have to visit the emergency room?
Finally got Deb going yesterday and rode 23 miles. This is bridge actually I-71 going from Cinti to Columbusjust north of Kings Island and not a bridge you want to go over if you're scared of heights.Great bike path though.bridge1.jpg
My sister-in-law and her family live in the Kings Island area. I think it's the same highway exit.
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never liked carrie underwood much, but after seeing this pic i'm convinced she's perfect in every way. weird.21h43mvy1x7y_carrieunderwood-softball-061009-25.jpgand for the sake of completeness:381013575_d2ee1efd81.jpg

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I was making jokes about it before -- my joke of choice was to list off a ton of symptoms, indicate how sick I was, and then say something like, "I am really worried I have SARS" -- but I definitely had Swine Flu when I was sick a few weeks back. My dad ended up getting sick after I spent about 10 minutes with him while I was dying, and since he has health insurance, he went to the doctor when his cough wouldn't go away. Money shot:Doctor: "Don't want to alarm you, but you almost certainly had a case of Swine Flu. Drink a lot of water, make sure your fever doesn't come back, and if you get markedly worse, come back in. Otherwise, take some Mucinex and buy some cough drops."Brvheart, your friend is full of shit. It was like a case of food-poisoning and a bad cold. You know what meds I took for my Swine Flu? Fucking Tylenol Severe Cold and Sinus. Anybody who dies of Swine Flu is just a faggot. I am going to be pretty busy for the next 48 hours or so, but I have two stories. One involves an argument with one of my neighbors about a laundry machine, and the other involves me getting yelled at by two black girls and a Muslim chick.

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STIMULATING CONVERSATION.
FLOP TURN CHECK RAISE STACK RAIL BUTTON HIJACK STEAL RIVER..... WOOT!I wanted to go on for a while longer but thats all the terminology I could remember....
get some cholorine tablets from the local pool chop and insert them in the tunnel and fill with water.It's definately not eco-safe but highly effective since it will create a gas
This reminded me of the time our neighbors (The Nutts.... had to add that just for Chris) had a condensate line stop up under the house. Diana called and quizzed me about it, so like a good neighbor I went over and unstopped it for herIt had been leaking for quite a while, causing mold to grow around the A-coil, so I took a few packets of pool shock (powdered chlorine) back over and dumped it around under the house to kill it....They had to stay in a motel room for two nights due to the aromaI sorta felt bad but as usual she just laughed at my hijinks.... I knew I shudda dumped the ole lady for her
I feel a little guilty because I laughed when I read about you setting yourself on fire. Did you have to visit the emergency room?My sister-in-law and her family live in the Kings Island area. I think it's the same highway exit.
I just burned the hair from my arms.... like I said, I was running pretty fastThink horizontal meteor and you'll get the picture... ARMY MEET!
I have two stories. One involves an argument with one of my neighbors about a laundry machine, and the other involves me getting yelled at by two black girls and a Muslim chick.
All the fixins for a great story.... neighbors, blacks, and laundry machinesThe Muslim chick already has me pissed off, though
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well it's official, i'm not you. you get confused with that guy, and i get confused with Jon Cryer.
yeah don't you hate it? I get the "holy crap! it's brad pitt!" all the time. so annoying.
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My moms cancer came back. I am not doing so well.
Damn. So sorry. Prayers, good vibes and well wishes to you and your mom.
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